“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

[...] (See my files.) On the other hand, you telepathically picked up from memory of a period in his life when he was afraid that he might die. In one probability he did. It was when he was worried about his own legs, and veins.

[...] In that case he would walk more evenly, the body resting in a still inferior but dependable stance. Instead he is moving through those stances rather quickly, not feeling at rest in any of them as the body now advances toward an ordinary posture.

Once again, his attempts are at the point of success, so it is highly important that he trust the physician within, and the body’s ancient knowledge, and I know he has begun again to use those suggestions.

He ignored what seemed to be a fact of reality, built his own constructive expectations, and made them the reality. He expects good things, and receives them. Now he also gives. At his own level he gives in his relationship with his students, and primarily his turn toward counseling is directed by a desire to help others. There is no one to whom he wishes ill. [...]

[...] When Leonard returned, all unknowingly he sent out constructive thoughts to which she also reacted; but he loved his lawn and his yard, and in his mind’s eye he saw it the way he wanted it, clearly, and it did become an event.

[...] When he finds he can afford the rent easily, he will realize he can afford a house easily. [...]

[...] There is one area you see where he (Leonard) is thus far entirely blocked, for he cannot love another person wholeheartedly, nor imagine himself in that position. [...]

[...] He tried to speed it up by negatively projecting present problems into the future, hoping to scare himself enough so that he would recover more quickly. [...] He should allow himself creative freedom then. Three: he should remind himself that his desire and intent are impressing Framework 2, and that as much as possible he should relax his efforts here.

When he made his earlier choices, leading to his difficulty, he did so in a smaller context, and when he considers his condition, he still does so in the light of one life alone, therefore depriving himself of other knowledge, quite personal, that is available. [...]

[...] Ruburt did try self-hypnosis then, but he was so overly concerned whether or not he would meet with results that for a while he simply exhausted himself with worry and concern. He held the session regardless, however, and allowed himself breathing space.

It is no tragedy, it is of no matter if on a particular day he thinks from the feeling of his legs he does not want to go out. There are periods of stability, as he knows, when he forgets the issue, and other periods when one leg is “working” more than the other.

He thought of himself as overly impulsive. Very seldom did he yell back at his mother. [...] He refrained from heavy sexual encounters—certainly not the behavior of a sexually impulsive person. He knew he didn’t want a family. [...]

[...] He felt he was too spontaneous, again, too impulsive—but then in that belief system he worried if his sexual needs could not be properly squashed, supposing someone else aroused them, and he “fell in love” with someone else as quickly as he had fallen in love with you. [...]

[...] Ruburt’s “overly conscientious self” was indeed built up in response to his belief that he was, to begin with, overly enthusiastic, overly impulsive, overly spontaneous. He was naturally expressive and open with people. He was creatively gifted—but an overly impulsive child does not care for an invalid mother, conscientiously, for 21 years.

He did not run away. He did not get into any serious difficulty. [...]

(But July 17, Thursday, he was with an associate who did have an accident. He and his boss, Cove Hoover, were driving home from a yearly outing for newspaper staff on Seneca Lake; Bill driving. [...] Kendall leaves main road and takes a country road that parallels Route 14 from Watkins Glen to Horseheads—he guns car. [...] Bill said that he probably would have been involved if he continued speeding after Kendall’s car to catch him. [...]

(On Friday, July 18, Bill Gallagher tells us he had a cluster of fairly close near-accident situations since Monday—one involving two boys on bicycles—he stopped about 20 yards from them—but he was going 55 at the foot of Mount Zoar Hill on Holden Road.

“Man is therefore set against his nature in his own mind, and he thinks he must control it. [...] But he himself has largely closed the door of comprehension, so that he only identifies with what he thinks of as his rational mind, and tries to forget as best he can those spontaneous processes upon which the mind rides so triumphantly.

1. “Now, for example,” Seth told us this evening, “man deals with a kind of dual selfhood, in that he presently thinks of himself as an uneasy blend of body and mind. He identifies primarily with what I call a limited portion of his consciousness. That portion he equates with mind or intelligence. He identifies with events over which he is aware (underlined) of having some control.

“Man thinks of acts, for example, and acting and doing, but he does not identify himself with those inner processes that make acting and doing possible. He identifies with what he thinks of as his logical thought, and the abilities of reasoning. These seem to suggest that he possesses an elegant, cool separation from nature, that the animals for example do not. He does not identify, again, with the processes that make his logical thinking possible. [...]

“He has often become frightened of his own creativity, then, since he has not trusted its source.”

Nor, given his particular personality pattern, could he easily have avoided initiating these practices. He felt driven to them. He is aware of the compulsion with which he acts when finances are concerned. Since he realizes that he did not choose, consciously, to take these illegal steps, then he cannot understand why he should ever be penalized for them.

[...] But because of his peculiar makeup the first, or first few tests after resumption are apt to be poor now, at this time, because he is apt to try too hard. He is not used to the touch enough yet. He loses the touch of it, and falls back on other layers of the self which are not reliable for this sort of data.

(By the time the landlord realized we couldn’t shovel our own way out, he couldn’t get his own plow into the driveway, nor could he hire help; everyone was busy. [...]

He is indeed in the wrong, but over tax matters, certain falsifications. [...] He is worried that the illegal tax methods in connection with his business will be discovered.

[...] I’m glad you live on such a nice corner; and as far as Einstein is concerned, he saw more than he knew he saw, and he was more than he knew he was. [...]

[...] He began to tease and jump at her, as he will do when he wants attention. Now however he was unusually persistent. Entangling himself in Jane’s feet as she tried to pace back and forth, he finally interrupted her dictation while she petted him. He then hopped up on Jane’s empty chair, opposite mine, and lay there staring at me for some time while I took notes. [...]

[...] In later life he will attain prominence if he carries through as beautifully as he did in the past. [...] This time he will attain prominence from poverty, an experience which will greatly reinforce the strength of his entity’s purpose.

[...] Jane had opened some fresh food for Willy, and while he ate in our very small kitchen she began putting the groceries away. [...] At my approach he began to hiss and spit quite madly, and raced about in a tight little circle, not being able to get out of the kitchen. [...] We had never seen Willy behave this way before, and in a few moments he was as friendly and calm as usual, and resumed eating.

He is making an endeavor to speak to you, not only in the resentments, but wishes. There was therefore interaction last evening when he felt resentful on a sensitive matter. He already felt he had reached a victory in approaching you after arguing with himself. He will not always be so sensitive to rebuff, you see.

He knew this, this being fairly natural, but he exaggerated your feeling, you see, because of his mental attitude, and felt he would be asking for alms.

(“How about if he uses some of it tonight, if he stays up to write as he plans?”)

Often he wanted you to approach him in intimate terms, but felt unworthy because of his condition, and because he felt that you found it distasteful, and even degrading. [...]

In a strange fashion, however, Hitler knew that he was doomed from the very beginning, and so did Germany as far as Hitler’s hopes for it were concerned. He yearned for destruction, for in saner moments even he recognized the twisted distortions of his earlier ideals. This meant that he often sabotaged his own efforts, and several important Allied victories were the result of such sabotaging. [...]

[...] It was because Hitler was so convinced of the existence of evil in the individual psyche, that he set up all of his rules and regulations to build up and preserve “Aryan purity.” [...] And while in the Jewish books [of The Old Testament] Jehovah now and then came through with great majesty to save his chosen people, he also allowed them to suffer great indignities over long periods of time, seeming to save them only at the last moment — and this time, so it seemed, he did not save them at all. [...]

[...] He believed in the superiority and moral rectitude of the Aryan race. In his grandiose, idealized version of reality, he saw that race “set in its proper place,” as natural master of mankind.¹

[...] He turned children into informers against their own parents. He behaved nationalistically, as any minor cult leader does in a smaller context. [...]

He has indeed learned, the hard way, lessons that he had to learn if he were to further develop. And yet these lessons all in all were self-given, and he is actually lucky, for they could have been far more difficult and the fruits of stubbornness could have been more bitter.

He developed this objective manner originally years ago because he feared he could not control his own spontaneity. [...] He will no longer block material now in the sessions, and therefore I will have a freer voice to counsel you when it may be needed.

[...] For Ruburt’s benefit yes, indeed, the cure is permanent, as long as he utilizes what he has learned, and it seems fairly certain that he will.

[...] Ruburt had several dreams concerning Miss Price, also a therapeutic dream last evening that he did not remember. During this period he did not remember his dreams because he purposely closed subconscious channels.

[...] When Ruburt needed jobs he worked in a factory, or he was a sales clerk or a door-to-door sales person—jobs he felt that gave him no prestige. He was afraid, however, of such jobs—prestigious ones—for fear the need for money would lead him to neglect his work. He became more economical.

If he could not go out so often, if he could not go on vacations, if he could not leave his desk, he would save not only energy but time and money as well. [...] He would not be tempted to buy so many clothes. [...]

[...] He differed from you only in that he carried your own ideas and his further in certain respects. In others, financially for example, he broke away first and you followed. [...]

[...] He holds his urine as he holds his breath, hardly taking time to breathe. This is not creative action, or productive action, as he is now with your help beginning to realize.

[...] It was indeed a healing one, when he was dealing with the plasticity of events, and bringing those he wanted into better focus, by consciously drawing upon his own larger creative abilities. He should do such exercises daily. [...]

[...] Overall, that dream, and today’s, both represented deep feelings that challenges could be met successfully, even in an adventurous fashion—that he was safe. Though the skies quaked or folded he would serve meals to many—meaning that he would offer them nourishment of another kind. [...]

(“During Monday’s session I was going to ask about that dream he had—on Monday afternoon, I think. [...]

[...] As he looked at it the front flap was open. In the dream he flew through this flap literally into another dimension, where the point of the flap was a hill upon which he landed. [...] Standing on the hill, he knew that in Perspective One the windows of the building in Perspective Three were jacket pockets, but he could no longer perceive them as such. Looking out from the hill in Perspective Two, Perspective One was invisibly behind him, and Perspective Three was still “ahead” of him, separated from him by a gulf he did not understand.

[...] He wanted to pursue a course that was unconventional. He felt he needed protection while he learned, and until he attained enough wisdom.¹⁴ The search itself would lead to a completely different set of values and a new belief system.

To his way of thinking he cut out all excess baggage, so he had a spare diet, physically speaking … The power of his will is amazingly strong. He is not one to work in many areas at once. [...] In all of this probabilities are involved, so in all moments of the past he touched points of probable healings.¹¹ No one can be healed against his or her will. [...]

(11:15.) He knew, however, that if the shades were pulled in the windows in Perspective Three, then the jacket-pocket flaps would appear to be closed in Perspective One. He also realized he had been directing the erection of the building in Perspective Three by making the jacket (in Perspective One).

[...] Bill and Peggy, he said, were very good for us and the sessions, in that they contributed. [...] Seth told Bill that if he follows the material given on the construction of matter and suggestion, and applies it, he can be rid of his ulcer within a year. [...] Then he will understand how he creates his own ulcer.

I could not get the meaning clearer to Ruburt, but he did not distort the meaning. He came as close as he could under the circumstances.

[...] He said Bill’s personal ideas were good ones; the inherent danger with them had to do with the type of salesman’s personality, the feeling of superiority and of having power over others, that might color the use of computers. He told Bill that it would require strict discipline on his part if he worked with computers in such a fashion.

(Seth told Bill he didn’t seem to have enough time in the day because he had the common habit of chopping time up into segments of minutes. A conception of time close to psychological time would give Bill enough time to do all he wants to do.

(Long pause at 10:23, eyes closed.) I make recommendations now and then, and now and then you see fit to follow them … ¹⁰ Considering Ruburt’s challenges, he has done extremely well as he cleared away the debris that literally surrounds the lives of most people … In a way his progress has been dependent upon the state of his learning, so that he has been trying to stretch the abilities of normal consciousness by drawing in other “strands.”¹¹ Yet because he was the one so involved, he had to test each strand; and in the meantime he still had his “old” consciousness, with its habits, to contend with.

I’ve also helped in the construction, so to speak, of Ruburt’s [psychic] library,⁴ and I hope that he will be able to meet me there, in surroundings in which he feels confident and at home, and yet on neutral ground. (Smiling:) He does not want my apparition, you might say, to intrude upon a physical living room, particularly, yet he wants to meet me (much louder, leaning forward) in an out-of-the-way place.⁵

[...] Obviously he is in the middle of a learning adventure, trying to do far more with his ordinary consciousness than most people, and trying to solve his problems and encounter his challenges without relying upon old structures of belief … He has done this even though he has been working in relatively untried areas, where there seem to be few certainties.⁹

Now: An artist does the same thing in different terms, when he or she imagines the probable versions that a painting, or a book or a sculpture, for example, might take. (Pause.) The artist does not usually understand, however, that those probable art productions do literally exist; he perceives only the final, physically chosen work. [...]

There was a reason, of which he may or may not be consciously aware. When he began to cut them down it was because of mistakes he had made: an overemphasis, a concern, so that he was watching himself too closely.

John must tell her that she is free to leave, and that he joyfully gives her her freedom, so that even after death she does not feel that she must stay close to him. She knows now for certain that they will be reunited, but she knows that he cannot be as aware of this as she is. [...] So she sees him as the self that he knows, and also as the people he has been, and already looks upon him with new eyes.

[...] He made some errors. These were so small in proportion to his success that he should forget them. And he did very well, tell him, in his encounter with Mr. Fisher, and with your mother’s friends in the hospital room.

He should remember to recognize resentment when he feels it, and then to realize that the resentment can be dismissed, can fall away from him. [...] But he must imagine the plucking-out process.

In a manner of speaking he approached other thresholds of perception, and with my help translated those data into the material given. He felt as if he had been on a long journey — and he was, though it was not a conscious one in the terms you recognize. [...] He will become more proficient, but for that reason I will now end the session.

(Long pause.) In ways most difficult to explain, man “absorbed” an animal’s spirit before he killed it, so that the spirit of the animal merged with his own. In using the animal’s flesh, then, the hunter believed that he was giving the animal a new focus of existence. He could draw on the animal’s strength, and the animal could join in human consciousness. [...]

[...] he has become aware of distances in his own consciousness, in a fashion difficult to describe. Neurologically he became familiar to some extent with the stuff beneath language, the inner rhythms unexpressed, and felt the odd connections that exist between words and your sense of time. [...] He will readjust “in no time.”

[...] The last paragraph of material may give clues to human behavior today: Man kills animals — and eats them — for reasons he’s consciously forgotten. [...]

[...] He is not moving that fast bodily, but his eyes are newly accustomed to faster motion. [...] He only looked downward when he walked. When he sat, he moved his entire head. [...] He was not aware of the difference before.

[...] Ruburt has gone to extraordinary lengths to cut out distractions, among other things, until he realized that he went too far.

Now: further illumination: when Ruburt asks you if you are tired five times in an hour, he means, “I love you. [...] But he does not express his love on such occasions—only his concern. [...]

That equalized pressure meant that he could see, hear, and smell, though in a restricted fashion. [...] The ear area clears, as he knows.

You see, for years Ruburt hid himself from his mother, and as stated earlier he felt that in giving her his book he had opened himself to her. For years he would not wear anything that had been close to her. Then he shoved this feeling away and would not face it.

You see however he felt that he was learning maturity by ignoring the subconscious. [...] He mistrusted the most reliable portion of his present personality. He automatically rejected the sweaters as giving warmth on a subconscious basis.

At various times when working he went without a bra because his shoulders bothered him, and he wore one of his mother’s sweaters. [...] The thin shoulders he imagines he has are a part of mother identification.

[...] He did not want to move until he was sure of his direction once more. [...]