“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

He was bothered particularly, you see, because his own mother’s position makes him terrified of being financially dependent, yet the way he chose to make, money at this particular point was precisely the wrong way for him at this time.

He felt his own respect and yours, he must take a job, and a regular one— and for the reasons given this had highly unpleasant repercussions that led to symptoms of immobility. These symptoms further aggravated his fears of dependence, and in his worse moments he feared that he would become a cripple and you would leave him. This was when the mother identification was at its peak—now long past.

The problems were related to Ruburt’s own writing, as you see. This last Saratoga episode was highly beneficial, even though it frightened Ruburt because he was afraid to use the freedom offered to him. There was great emotional charge behind the whole reunion question, and the “shall I go—shall I not go”—questioning discharged long withheld energy. Symbolically Ruburt came to grips with the whole Saratoga problem with his mother and the past.