“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

Ruburt’s almost instant reaction following the G.I. notice was, here, excellent. The aggressive feeling, unharnessed, would have caused difficulties at the gallery, and even in your personal relationship. His seeking out of his friend, your landlady, was beneficial, since in harmless talk and chatter much aggressive energy was harmlessly constructed.

There is much leeway here. I would, if I may, suggest a reinforcement unfortunately in this sort of expectation. I would suggest on your part a rather illogical but perhaps understandable feeling of guilt, involving your father. I would suggest, indeed, that perhaps you hesitate as the first son, to be more financially solvent than your father is, and therefore in your own eyes symbolically shame him.

It did not you see before you realized that you were basically an artist, because then the two elements of talent and money were not in contact. You could have made a much less painful transition between complete commercialism and painting than you did, but here at a crucial moment was starry-eyed Ruburt, with his ideas of the poverty-stricken artist; and you can carry on from there.