“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

It is pointless to ignore the fact that you feel hatred, even though hatred is a distortion of a basic psychic mobility. Unless you learn never to distort the basic consciousness survival in terms of hatred, you will always have to deal with seemingly unresolved hatreds and aggressions.

You are secure as long as you put a good portion of energy into painting, but this distortive expectation of yours could end up making you bitter even against your painting; because even when you are pleased with your work, it could tend, definitely, to prevent you, in strong terms, from seeking not only financial reward from it, but other satisfactions as well by preventing you from showing it where such showing in galleries and exhibitions throughout the country is important.

Such a veto upon exhibitions for example is not part of your distortive expectation now, but could easily become part of it. All expectations evolve, valid and invalid ones.

In your field of art you could do better now than he is in science fiction, since you are more sure of how you get your effects, and he is still not. Your fear of freelance work is mainly, but not entirely, caused by your distortive expectation. On the one hand you fear making too much money, while consciously you fear not making enough, for the energy expanded; and I do mean expanded, rather than extended.

You are bending over backward not to make money, both of you, though this is somewhat more understandable on Ruburt’s part, at least since his training is not as specific. When either of you demand or request more money, you feel like thieves. Ruburt has yet to manage his abilities competently but you have except for this distortive expectation which colors your constructions.