Results 61 to 80 of 1720 for stemmed:his
Remind him of his kindnesses to your apartment-house neighbor, Miss Callahan, to his many students, and of his love for you. Also remind him that he did not deal with malice toward his own mother. Do remind him affectionately and often that for many years he loved his mother deeply, and that his own existence made his grandfather experience a love that was a light in his later years.
These elements are all living and highly potent in the affairs of his life — so that in no way do his relationships with his mother (pause) become any isolated concentration, existing apart from the other affairs of life. [...]
[...] He is Jane to himself and to the universe and to you, and to his friends and his readers.
[...] The poetry is his best touchstone here. He was angry at Fell for rather obvious reasons, but the reasons involved his work, which touched upon his energy, and this caused then the unfortunate comparison between Fell and Ruburt’s father. [...]
The power of his energies, unfortunately, can be seen quite clearly in the severity of the symptoms that the energy formed when it was so misdirected. The personal material on his background that I gave you is all part of this, of course. [...]
This energy is, of course, related strongly with his work. [...] They must, therefore, be used in exciting creative ways having to do with his intuitions, intellect, and creative work.
He projected his resentment into the future, and against all other publishers for awhile, anticipating the same sort of response as he felt the ESP book had received. [...] It is a healthy sign that he has changed his stand here.
Ruburt is developing his abilities, and I helped him on that occasion. [...] Let him get his results, and do his critical work afterwards. His abilities are being released because energy is now being released.
The father, your father, represents to him, Ruburt, the helpless portions of his own mother, directed so to speak where he can see them. Your mother represents to him the destructive, unreasoning energies of his own mother, and in the pull and conflict between your mother and father, he sees the tortured connections of his mother’s soul.
Your father fulfilled his main purpose in this existence, and was satisfied, sometime within five to seven years after his marriage. [...] The main portion of his personality, the integrating functions, the strong core, left, and rejoined the entity years ago. [...]
It is highly necessary then that his present course be maintained, expressing his emotions honestly to himself and to you; and examining them, if he prefers, afterward, then taking with you whatever steps are necessary in your family situation.
The man who offered the suggestion to Philip may not realize himself that the original idea was not his own. [...] Very approximately here, his age—because of the hair color I am not sure—maybe 47 to 67, for his face is not old though his hair is white.
[...] However it is to his advantage to solve these problems on his own before that time. Sometimes he wants to be too certain that his feet are on the ground.
(John said that his boss was very nervous that day at the meeting in Rochester, when the transformation took place in his features. [...] John said he could understand his boss’s feeling of desperation, which led in turn to the transformation.)
(John stated that his brothers-in-law live in Philadelphia and have no connection with John in Williamsport, or his political activities, etc.
[...] In his life [each] man is embarked upon a cooperative venture with his own species, and with the other species, and dying he also in that regard acts in a cooperative manner, returning his physical substance to the earth. [...] Spiritually speaking, his “purpose” is to understand the qualities of love and creativity, to intellectually and psychically understand the sources of his being, and to lovingly create other dimensions of reality of which he is presently unaware. (Pause.) In his thinking, in the quality of his thoughts, in their motion, he is indeed experimenting with a unique and a new kind of reality, forming other subjective worlds which will in their turn grow into consciousness and song, which will in their turn flower from a dream dimension into other ones. [...]
The practical nature of his own dreams was also more apparent, for again, his dreams sent him precise visions as to where food might be located, for example, and for some centuries there were human migrations of a kind that now you see the geese make. [...] [But] more and more man began to identify himself with his exterior environment. He began to think of his inner ego almost as if it were a stranger to himself. It became his version of the soul, and there seemed to be a duality—a self who acted in the physical universe, and a separate spiritlike soul that acted in an immaterial world.
Last week I received from our current optometrist (whom I’ll call John Smith) his standard notice that two years have passed since my glasses were changed. [...] Because of a cancellation I got a quick appointment to see John this afternoon—and received a very pleasant surprise, for his examination revealed that my vision has improved since the last prescription. [...] John too was surprised; he double-checked his figures to make sure he was right before ordering the weaker lenses. Once John had assembled his pheropter, or lens unit, the test lenses making up the new prescription, my vision checked out at 20/15—better than the so-called normal 20/20. [...]
[...] (Long pause.) At the time of this awakening man did experience, then, some sense of separation from his dream body, and from his own inner reality—the world of his dreams—but he was still far more aware of that subjective existence than you are now.
Castaneda’s books, for all their seeming unconventionality, had a niche to fall into, for here was the quite conventional scholar exploring a culture, even of the mind; not his own—but safely, within an academic framework to which he then returned, and to which academic readers could identify. Castaneda had his society’s credentials ahead of time. That society could then accept his journeys, and the individuals could allow themselves to follow his adventures, and forgive him for his cultural transgression because he brought home goodies.
It is good of you to make the bed, and at this state at least the condition of his arms makes it difficult. But when you take over the responsibility for washing his clothes you are denying him acts that he did do—and can do, and adding to a sense of powerlessness in that regard. Help him wring out his slacks, for example, when he has trouble doing so, but do not automatically wash his things for him.
Tam instantly saw the quality in our work, and Ruburt’s. In the beginning only his enthusiasm sold our first book. [...] It was Tam who saw in Ruburt’s original manuscript the importance of his work, and the way in which Ruburt was trying to hide it by playing down his relationship with me.
In the old frame of reference he had to convince himself that his body could not move well, or fast. Then he did not need to deal with what he thought of as distracting elements—to leave his desk. [...] He found, in time, that the symptoms however were far more limiting than he had counted upon, and as his experience grew he found he needed less so-called “safeguards.”
The old neighborhood has enclosed him, and he must now truly escape its limitations while using the psychic potential of his experience as an integrating power. [...] He does not feel free to use his full energy until all portions of the personality are convinced of the goodness of his purpose. [...]
The grandfather was as rigid in his way as the grandmother. He was afraid of his own thoughts as a child, believing that thoughts could kill. The unspoken bitterness against his mother built up inside him. [...]
There were deeply-significant roots to his relationships with the various priests, that had almost magical connotations to him and his psyche. [...]
When your words disagreed with his spontaneous self severe conflicts arose. [...] You were through your art however also connected to his spontaneous self. [...]
In other words, he felt that unless he was using his abilities fully, and was spiritually, creatively and psychically perfect, he should mar his physical performance. His idea of honesty and his literal interpretation led him to the idea after the worst part of his difficulties were over, that he should keep some of the symptoms to show he was not a hypocrite to others.
[...] For example, Ruburt is doing very well in his classes, enjoys it, and closes his eyes, relatively speaking, to the improvement he has worked in the lives of his students, and to the freedoms he has allowed himself in class in using his abilities. [...]
I suggest, quite seriously, that Ruburt make up a list of his accomplishments; that he make a list of his good points; that he write down a short list of those things he thinks he is doing right (humorously), and the things he enjoys; and you add to these lists. I want him to concentrate upon his accomplishments rather than any failings, and you also. [...]
His symptoms would become then at times symbols of your joint lack of perfection, mainly in your works. His symptoms became a hanger upon which you could hang your joint dissatisfactions, his physical condition an easy mark to stand for what both of you considered inner imperfections; again, connected mainly with your creative endeavors.
[...] That always stimulates his idea of responsibility. It is his public image as a psychic, of course, not as a writer, that here is the issue. [...] (Pause.) It will serve to inspire others, but each person is responsible for his or her own life, and Ruburt does not have a private clientele, nor is he temperamentally suited to use his psychic abilities to track people down or to serve as a therapist. That narrows his abilities too specifically and holds him down from other kinds of explorations for which he is highly equipped and quite proficient. [...]
[...] Later he tried straight novels, but when he let himself go his natural fiction fell into the form of fantasy, outside of the novel’s conventions into science fiction’s form—and at that time further away from the mainstream. He managed to get some of his work published, however, so that as he reached his early 30’s he had some apprenticeship under his belt. [...]
I have mentioned this on occasion—that he felt quite different from his contemporaries. [...] No matter what he was taught in Catholic school or later in the public one, his intuitions, wedded to his creative capacities, led him to question established views. [...]
His creative abilities led him beyond the precepts of that church, creatively speaking, at a fairly early age—though the actual breaking-off point did not occur in fact until he was in his teens. [...]
His own work was not focused upon as it should have been, to his way of seeing things. Now he must go ahead and take his chances. [...] What he means is the production of a work of his own in those terms that he considers art, an accomplishment whether or not it brings financial success.
At the same time he began to doubt his writing abilities. Perhaps he had overjudged his talents. [...] I am digressing here to bring you another issue: the strong responsibility he always felt toward his writing ability, he naturally felt toward the psychic ability—but without the necessary sense of discrimination, since he didn’t realize what such activities involved.
[...] Conflicts arose because his responsibilities clashed. [...] At times he was convinced that he had made a failure of his life so far—with you and his work.
[...] Not because he did not like the material, but because then, at least, he understood that for him (underlined) assembling it during his creative hours was not fulfilling his kind of creative need.
(Long pause.) Ruburt has been adding to the strength of the negative influences of his past. [...] His background was unfortunate. [...] Many of his most redeeming qualities and characteristics were formed by it.
[...] He must indeed, completely, rid himself of his strong resentments at his mother. [...] He cannot resent the environment nor his parent, since he chose both. [...]
The dream book was an attempt to try again, a desperate attempt for independence on his part to succeed in spite of the negative influences. (Pause.) He felt that you rejected it as a whole, and completely. His impatience and panic did impede his judgment, causing him to send it out too early, and for this he blamed you.
[...] Because of his own background you knew that he would not push you in this respect. He has an innate talent for making money, that has not been developed nor used for these reasons; and all suggestions made by him to you have been regarded by you as threats, and he felt that the suggestions were mistakes on his part. [...]
If he is considering his own personal situation, however, let him remember that the firewalker utterly believes in his ability. [...] His feet are not burned simply because he has faith that they will not be. [...] The man’s focus is there, as Ruburt focuses in his work. [...]
Frank’s experience concerning his brother is a case in point. His brother did not know that the urban renewal gentleman was in that particular restaurant where the two might meet, and until the meeting did occur nothing showed in Framework 1, though much was occurring in Framework 2. The creative potential knows exactly what changes must occur in Ruburt’s body so that he can walk normally. It also knows what changes must occur in his mind—what conflicts must be resolved, and all of this is being taken care of. The process of his complete recovery includes body events and other events that may seem to have no connection—events perhaps that will change an attitude here or a belief there.
[...] In those terms, his interests are now the same, but he no longer looks upon his historically known works, but considers them as background pieces, so to speak. He paints in another reality to which his own intent has led him, except that his creativity has opened up so that he no longer feels the same need for isolation.
His inspiration comes now from all of history, and from that larger reservoir he forms the new focus of his art. It was his secondary interest in writing, largely unexpressed in life, that formed some connective between he and Ruburt.
[...] This alone showed him that his solution was wrong. The nature of his own individuality makes it impossible for him to accept such a solution. [...] This is a case where his curiosity stands him in good stead.
This evening’s explosion on his part did represent an advance. He would not have let himself spontaneously express his anger in so direct a fashion earlier.
[...] He had nothing to do with making his mother a cripple, nor does his fear, hatred or scorn of her keep her in that condition.
He is not responsible for the fact that his father left his mother. [...]
[...] His performance, Joseph, was extremely heartening, since he trusted his own intuitions this time; that he did not pound his head against the wall, as in the past. He was correct in his afternoon insight. The book was his spiritual and intellectual battleground (the dream book), and this was paralleled by the physical symptoms; the physical battlefield. [...]
His classes will show the change. His students perfectly sensed his attitudes, and while he led them with his right hand, he cautioned them to hold back with the other. [...] The classes will expand, and with students who will fit in admirably, for now his position is a stronger one.
[...] It has caused him to hold back from fully developing his abilities; not only his psychic abilities. It has caused him to hold back in the development of his full writing talents, for these specialized creative abilities, the writing techniques, will come into their own now that the personality is more fully behind our work.
You will always find that Ruburt’s writings are precise barometers, giving excellent indications as to his inner state of mind; showing also the quality and direction of his beliefs at any given time.
[...] Ruburt has had his own negative attitudes about his illness to contend with, and often yours as well. You did more good by telling him he bent over well from the front this evening (while we were exercising), that simple statement, than you ever could by any remark, however well-meaning, that he is not bending his leg when he walks for example.
With the best intentions in the world, his conscious attention was on his symptoms and his physical condition all day long, on the procedures involved with motion.
He can do this by concentrating on his book, getting out more. [...] He had some difficulty because of the childhood experience of seeing his mother ill for so long. [...]
When he was walking his thoughts were upon how well or poorly he was walking, rather than on his book, the weather, or some neutral subject.
[...] Too often he has identified himself with his symptoms. He has in his mind seen himself not as a woman who had certain symptoms, along with many excellent good points and abilities, but he has identified himself primarily at times with the symptoms alone. Hence the appalling “monster woman” image that sprang to his mind.
He was afraid not only of his own emotions, but terrified of his mother’s emotions. [...] He can also give expression to a very deep concern about his fellow man, safely, since the family relationship is not involved.
[...] He also on his own speaks loudly in class, and automatically accepts his own composure, status as teacher, and his abilities, without question.
Now when he was doing disguised autobiographical novels he released his fears through his writing. [...] He used some of our material as an excuse to further shove his fears beneath, overexaggerating certain remarks that I had made. [...]
[...] Earlier his own spontaneous nature, his desire for social intercourse, his simple love of fun, were strong enough to overcome the inner feelings that made him shy away from people. [...]
The whole thing boils down to the fact that he thought and felt you would not help him, but demand that he use his own abilities and help himself independently of you. You held his arm once as he crossed a busy street, in, I believe, Cobbleskill, and he never forgot it. [...] There were other occasions when you held his arm and helped him and he remembers each one.
[...] You were not pleased with his performance, he was not living up to your expectations. He equated then a normal physical performance, from the standpoint of his condition, as an impossible perfect performance, while feeling that nothing short of perfection would please you.
[...] when you were working particularly at Artistic, you could not say he was out gadding around and not using his abilities. There he was in his chair. [...]
He is face to face with himself, with his abilities, ambitions and limitations, now, with a whole day more or less to work toward his goal, and he feels great urgency. This is fine, a driving force, but his strength comes from among other things his very personal involvement with nature, and from his contemplation of it. [...]
Because of his rather intense mental work, I would suggest walks and other physical activities. [...] They will prevent too much inner involvement, open new doors, bring psychic refreshment, and also provide our hungry friend with his diet of new ideas. As indeed his latest story was initiated by a remark made by a neighbor.
[...] Hammering at his subconscious as he does on his few walks negates their purpose. [...] After all, his subconscious would like some rest too. [...]
His subconscious will provide all the spontaneous ideas that he needs for his own work, but he cannot sit it in a corner, lecture it, and demand very definite specific tasks. His subconscious knows better than he does consciously what particular means should be used to gain a desired end. [...]
[...] This in itself is good, but his idea of “work” was what limited him, and what is still limiting him. His life is his “work.” This includes his particular, unique, extraordinary abilities; but these spring out of his life, and even out of his relationship with you.
[...] Ruburt wonders how much wasted energy went into Picasso’s antics—that should have gone into his work. [...] Picasso’s free flow of energy in all areas freed energy for his work, and did not detract from it. He kept his channels to energy open, therefore the energy flowed through his work freely, and in a short period of time he could produce a painting that might take years for another as gifted to produce, who husbanded his talent as a miser.
[...] Ruburt has been trying to dam his spontaneity to make sure it flows only through his work, and in doing so has hampered both his life and his work.
[...] His continuing love provides however the climate, the steady reassuring climate, the only climate in which you dare to taste that isolation. He fears his spontaneity directed toward you sexually and emotionally would threaten you. [...] Ruburt equates spontaneity with emotionalism, therefore he imagines that his spontaneity will threaten your art.
A good deal of the time, he hid his own decisions from himself. His nature is open—basically trustful, and direct in its dealings with the world and others. [...] He has great powers of concentration, as indeed all mystics do, and everything in his environment becomes charged and important.
[...] He was bound to publish his work—any kind—but equally determined to protect his private nature. The secretness meant that he could hide his intent from himself for some time. [...]
[...] Ruburt, however, deals well with individuals, as in class; while preserving his privacy he still extended it. He enjoyed radio, even on your tours, because he spoke from a concealed viewpoint, where his person was concealed. The secret elements of his personality rise up against the public connotations of standing before the crowd. [...]
[...] His poetry was largely mystical poetry, and though he did not dwell upon the fact, he realized that this vast inner reality of his was quite beside the point of living as far as other people were concerned.