“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

(The day was brilliant and very warm — almost 80 degrees when I left the house for 330. Jane’s room was pleasantly cool, though. Later I turned on the fan. She showed me how the large scab on her right knee, over the site of the broken bone that had become infected, had peeled off partially in hydro this morning. It’s now half its former size. Underneath the missing portion I saw the fresh pink flesh of new growth. There is still a large hole in the leg at the drainage site. Both of us felt good about the improvements, though.

(On the way to 330 this noon I stopped to give the hospital the check for $18,000-plus that I’d received the day before yesterday from Blue Cross. A couple of weeks previously a check for some $3700 had arrived; the two go together to make one payment as billed by the hospital to the insurance company. I’m afraid that when I opened the letter and saw the check for the $18,000, I felt no reaction at all. I wondered then at my lack of feeling. I put my neutral state down to the long wait involved, my decision not to worry if at all possible, and probably other factors I haven’t even bothered to examine. Anger must be involved. Nor did I feel anything when the check for the $3700 came. I confess the lack of feeling here has caused me periodic concern.