“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

(Slowly, with many pauses at times:)

Even before our sessions began, you both knew that generally speaking, now, you were quite different from other people, highly gifted creatively and intellectually. You suspected that you were not as “mired” (long pause) as other people were, and also that in some fashion you were not as committed to usual (underlined) physical experience. You felt sometimes as if you wanted to spy upon life, observe it rather than live it directly. This was not because you were afraid of life (as I often wondered when I was younger), but because your purposes and intents were different.

(Long pause at 9:30.) It might be fairly easy, Ruburt suspected, to become even contemptuous of others. You both felt, again to some degree, that people could not understand your particular kinds of creativity. They could easily become jealous. They could also highly resent your abilities. You both felt an honest and deep compassion for other people, however: even winning in a sports event, you felt sorry for the loser.

Ruburt picked up the idea instead, and toyed with it. When the sessions started you were both amazed at the ease with which the material was received, struck by its quality, aware at certain levels of its challenge. Ruburt was astonished, and became more so at the spontaneous nature of his own and my creativity. (Long pause.) There were certain deep questions about life, certain pressing problems about man’s condition, with which you felt you had little experience, since your primary goals had been to examine life, to stand apart from it to study it, And therefore you both felt that you had few of the same concerns as those that led other people (quietly intent).

You did not have the family concerns of children, as Ruburt mentioned. Without such concerns, you began to feel that you had an even more unfair advantage. (Long pause.) In the meantime, all of the issues we have mentioned as being connected with Ruburt’s symptoms of course were present to one extent or another, in abeyance. You wanted to ask the kind of questions that were important to other people, beside questions of your own, because the meaning of life itself lay also in other areas than your own. You also wanted a bridge and protective coloration.

(Long pause.) Your purposes meant that you required a certain amount of isolation from the world—so any handicap that was accepted would also be one that fit into those other purposes.

(Long pause.) All of the ideas of the Sinful Self had been in abeyance—(10:00. The telephone rang, and at Seth’s urging I answered it. Margaret Bumbalo told me she and her husband were going up to their cottage on the lake; they asked that I take in their mail.)

(Long pause.)In a way, to a degree—the qualifications are necessary—you provided yourselves an extra kind of commitment that would keep your observations of life from becoming too surface, or so it seemed. When your parents were alive, their problems could be used somewhat in a second-handed fashion for the same purposes. Before that, jobs for both of you served to make you rub elbows, so to speak, with others, and to equalize your paths and theirs. As you became better off financially you felt the need again for that kind of equalization, or handicap.

(10:12.) Now: Ruburt’s hearing is not impeded (long pause), meaning that he is not losing his hearing. That condition was also related to the telephone one, adding the extra difficulty of clearly hearing a television—or rather radio—program, and the hearing difficulty was aggravated along with the hands.

The substance you are using (DMSO) acts in its way, now, almost like a shock treatment, introducing certain parts of the body to a relaxation that feels unnatural because it is not gradual. The body does not feel stable, for example. (Long pause.) That effect is somewhat aggravated by hot weather, by Ruburt’s way of using energy, and because he is physically a small person. A larger person with more body area and weight would be less affected, for example, as say with alcohol.

(Long pause.) The feet are connected with the overall situation itself. In that they want greater activity and circulation. More exercising of the feet will be of benefit. On a physical level alone the heat is also somewhat connected. You used this period, however, yourselves, as a time to critically aggravate the symptoms (long pause), almost as if you were looking over a body of work to see what you thought of it, and what you wanted to do next.