“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

First of all, let us get a clearer view of your own intents through the years. Looking at your parents, you decided early that you would have a certain kind of relationship with a woman—a closeness that your father did not have with your mother—one that involved many facets of your own personality and with its purposes. Otherwise you would not have married.

Now. I put this to you—that you spend time in the same way, but in your way, concentrating upon all that stands in the way of your work and concentration, until finally your work time seems consumed. Only now and then do you get on top of those thoughts and imaginings. You spend four times as much time worrying about the distractions as the so-called distractions themselves actually take. In doing so you rob yourself of peace of mind. You imagine future distractions, yet when Ruburt projects his symptoms into the future, you see clearly his error—though he may not.

Ruburt fears that if he were suddenly better he would add to your distractions, so when distractions seem threatening to you he emphasizes the symptoms: if he were better, would you want him to do all the chores? So your ideas about distractions intertwine. If he were better he could help you with the chores—but if he could, would you then withdraw to your studio and leave them all to him? All of this because distractions, so to speak, are considered threats. All of this because you both believe there are serious impediments in the way of creative work, and obstacles ever-present to mitigate against your creativity. So you each react differently. At the same time, because of some cultural beliefs, you are still not all that trustful about creativity to begin with.

(10:47 PM. But it proved to be the end of the session after all. Jane soon decided to end it, saying that she had that “sick feeling” she sometimes gets when the material has been very personal. Later she told me that Seth had been there, ready with more blocks of material.)