“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

His reaction was to not hide the ability in your way, but to force the world to accept it. Again, it is important that since the works were published—even for example the ESP book—neither of you understood your (my) financial contribution. Even to the ESP book, not just the session material that you took down. But your limited focuses blinded you. That kind of contribution was literally invisible—not legitimate, because you had not sold paintings.

Ruburt used his body as a symbol of the entire situation, and the symptoms as a way of maintaining privacy, and lack of distraction on both of your parts—again, inhibiting sexual freedom, spontaneous outings that threatened both of your ideas. He would go so far, throw out test balloons, and meet with your disapproval. The disapproval was yours, and you saw his fears projected upon you. You were both happy when he showed some improvement, because neither of you wanted physical disability carried too far, but as soon as he showed signs of being free enough so that he could really take a trip, or dance, you both clamped down. He always waited to see what you would do, and these episodes, again, occurred after enough improvement, so that first he wanted to go out. Sometimes he forced himself to, thinking he was denying you the pleasure of your bars and outings. But despite what you said, he saw that you did indeed disapprove.