“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

The Nebene characteristics, now creatively used, then also mitigated against Ruburt’s easy expression of such feelings, and he did tie up some characteristics of Nebene with his mother’s scorn. He is not worried so much that you have not made a great financial success of your art. He is ashamed of the following feelings:

(Further, my urge toward doing my best work comes at an age when I feel that I should be doing my best work. When I started painting, I was appalled to discover my ignorance. I’ve spent years trying to learn. The urge to learn, perhaps overdone, may be one of the Nebene characteristics, [and as an aside I thoroughly wish the Nebene character did not exist.] But regardless of that, I didn’t think my wish to excel in my chosen field necessarily a poor one. I was willing to spend the time necessary to master painting. Each one has been a trial. The last year has been very productive as far as learning goes, and I’m at the point where I expect it to begin paying rich dividends. It also seems that this point coincides with a time of trial for Jane and me, as witness these deleted sessions.