“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

(To Sue:) Now you have been projecting your fears about yourself outward, so that all of your husband’s remarks were interpreted in that light. This aggravated some of his own original conceptions. Some of your interpretations were legitimate, based upon his attitudes, but many more were the innermost doubts that you have not faced as to who you were, and deep questions involving the nature of your person as it is related to your particular sex in this life.

You were aggressively aware of the difference between your own attitude and some of society’s in that regard, but for the first time in your life you were closely involved with another person, day by day—who to some extent (underlined) then served as a moving picture onto which you projected these fears as to your own worth.

Intellectually you are certain enough of your worth as a person, but emotionally not nearly as certain as far as other abilities are concerned. You wanted support. You wanted confirmation of your hopes and of your faith in yourself, but because of your fears these clouded the reality that you perceived.

(Humorously:) I am not done with you yet, but I do not want him (Carl) to feel left out over here, and while you are recovering I will speak to him: for you were also in your own isolated universe, and if hers had fears in it, then yours was a valley of desolation in which your emotions were like unruly animals galloping around in there; and you were so frightened and worried about your own worth that you could not consider hers, and you were so insecure that her sensing insecurity, when you were aware of it, drove you to anger.

You felt hardly strong enough to handle your own fears, and could not bear the thought that she might need your help also. Now even in her position, she made efforts to get across to you, and bridges that could cross her own fear to you, but you were not able to meet her because you feared the chasm of despair within yourself.

You did not see yourselves as people of integrity coming together in love, but as insecure individuals hoping that love could find the answer to fears that you were not willing to face otherwise.

There were, shall I say, errors on both parts. (To Sue:) You tried to relate more strongly. Your fears did not hold you back with the unreasoning strength that his held him back.

(To Carl:) From your own parents you also have some false premises, having to do with sex. Now. You have been twice as upset over your own fears because you are a man, and think that a man should be free of them. You also find yourself in the position where you believe you should be the entire support of your family, and where you know you have both been taking the easy way out, and you hate yourself for it.

Your father cut out his own world, you felt, in his house and in the wilderness, comparatively speaking, but at the same time because you feared him so you did not really feel he wanted you to do the same no matter what he said—because to prove yourself a better man would automatically destroy him.