“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

The ego is now somewhat in the confidence of the whole self, therefore we have more to contend with. We are no longer tricking the ego, which it would ultimately and sometimes almost disastrously resent, but taking it into the confidence of the whole self, so that it will allow departure from the physical image, as a mother can finally be convinced that it is safe for a son or daughter to go out alone.

(Also November 9, Monday, 7 PM: In doze, asked silently if I was being warned about a death. If so whose? If not, what was the message? Few seconds later I saw a brown hand mirror held out. I saw it edge on. I got scared, wouldn’t look, I guess afraid I’d see my own face. As it vanished it occurred to me that the face wouldn’t have to be mine. Upset. Checked with the pendulum. It said warning was of my mother’s death, in December. And that the psychological time experiences, today and Friday, were connected with the warning from Helen McIlwain. Linda was not involved. Don’t know how trustworthy the pendulum is.)

(A boy handed me a long, legal-sized black envelope. Helen McIlwain’s name was the return address, written in black ink on the envelope. [She was a friend of my mother’s, now dead.] I took the envelope to contain notification of my mother’s death. I guess I opened it and read inside, though now I don’t recall doing so. Then with relief saw that the death was not to be that close. Not my mother, but a young girl. Got the name Linda, and the last name, which I think I’ve forgotten—don’t think it was Butts. But there was a connection with Linda.

(I was relieved that it wasn’t my mother, but my reasoning was cold-blooded. First I thought: “Well, I’ve always feared my mother’s death,” and I was almost relieved that it was over. Then relief when it wasn’t her death, but someone else’s.

(If it is a death, and in Rob’s family, say of Linda, which I doubt, then why the return name of my mother’s friend? [With whom I was not close?] Maybe one of my nieces, instead of Rob’s? Joan? In dream I think the death must have already happened. My death? No feeling that it was, though I could have substituted names. But the person [to die?] was younger than I am, I think. And who was the boy? He waited while I read the message inside. But can’t remember reading it, just interpreting it. Somewhat unsettling dream.)