“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

(The day was a rather quiet one for us comparatively. Jane looked scrubbed and clean when I got to 330; her hair was braided, her bed changed, the room shone. [...]

[...] I was upset because I didn’t want her to slack off on eating, and perhaps start losing weight when she was doing so well. [...]

[...] I opened the curtains—it was now approaching dusk—and turned on the blower. The window was already opened as wide as it would go.

(Then Jane told me that Jan was in this morning, and told her that the ulcers were looking very good—meaning that there has been considerable improvement in them since Jane saw them last. [...]

[...] “They still feel like satin,” she said, but she was careful not to move too much so as not to make the catheter leak more. [...] I was reminded to tell her that in reviewing many of the personal sessions we’d had at the time Seth was also delivering Dreams, he’d stressed over and over again that each time her body had tried to heal itself, with sore muscles resulting, Jane had tightened herself back up. She had consistently misunderstood the messages her body was giving her. [...]

[...] At 4:10 Teresa began sounding off—but her voice sounded muted, as though she was speaking behind a closed door. [...] I was surprised at both statements. [...]

[...] There was enough snow when I left the hospital to make me take it quite easy driving home. It was 20 degrees when I got up this morning, and three hours later as I type this record it isn’t much warmer.)

(Jane was upset when I got to 330 this noon: Her catheter had been completely pulled out of her this morning after hydro, when Georgia and Steve had transferred her back into bed from the litter. [...]

[...] She said she was not aware of any of the data while she was giving it, or what it might mean, whether it was valid, etc.

[...] Jane said this was a reference to the position of the cap-ring against my note, while the two items were sealed between the two Bristol stiffeners and in the double envelopes. [...] To the right is a rough indication of the position she refers to, and which she was able to verify to some extent as she opened the envelopes at break. Remember the note was actually folded over the cap, like a sandwich; evidently the pressure of the two Bristol stiffeners and the two envelopes held the cap in the same position relative to the note.

[...] There could be many sources of red that Friday evening; for instance, the candle I used to deposit a coat of carbon black on the cap used as object, was a brilliant red; this was a large fat candle, and one we have used in previous experiments. [...] This was after we had finished the table tipping.

[...] When a fourth member was added to the last table tipping of the evening, featuring Jane, Bill, Don and myself, the wicker armchair was pressed into use since it was the only one available except for a Kennedy rocker. [...]

[...] I was very tired and relaxed. I hadn’t used the pendulum, for example, but I suspected that I was reacting to calling off the tape deal. I was still worrying that I’d hurt others and cost them money, though.)

(Jane told me that Fred Kardon was in to see her this morning. [...] Jane wasn’t sure when he was leaving, but it’s probably tomorrow morning, or even tonight. [...]

(However, this morning, Jane said, Fred was amazed at the way the large ulcer on the outside of her right knee is healing itself. [...] That was all. [...]

[...] When LuAnn was in she replaced the new nose patch that Georgia had put on to replace the one Phyllis had put on yesterday—the first one had been too big, the second too small, the third one was just right.

This artistic sense of responsibility was given a thicker coat by what seemed to be psychic responsibility: it seemed to Ruburt that he should use his abilities primarily to help others, or to help solve the world’s problems, or to cast some light into man’s condition. Certainly the attitude of some correspondents was involved there. Actually, however, it was the simple extension of such a feeling into the psychic realm, where it was further hardened by many religious views. [...]

[...] “I don’t know whether it was right or not—it involved you. [...] The idea of the trouble you gave yourself with the rib was connected with the guys coming to work here, to give you an excuse to do your thing and be isolated so they wouldn’t ask you to help, or strain yourself physically because you were already hurt. [...] I waited to see if he was going to give it, and when he didn’t, I did.”

(At 9 PM I was thinking of telling Jane to forget the session when she remarked, “I almost feel him around.” I don’t think we’ve ever “abandoned” a session once we sat for it, but was willing to do it if need be. [...]

[...] The imagination was itself considered suspect. It was felt that creativity served no responsible end in society. [...]

[...] That love of nature, and appreciation, quickened and utilized inner biological capacities, also possessed by plants and animals, so that man was more consciously aware of his part in nature. [...] It is almost impossible in your time to describe man’s reality when he was consciously aware that he would die and yet not die, and when he was everywhere surrounded by those inner data of his psyche.

[...] The messiah was a myth waiting for factual clothes. [...] In a manner of speaking, now, it would make little difference which man was finally given the kingly robes—for the greater reality of the dream was so encompassing that it would come to be, whether one or 10 or 20 men’s lives were historically joined together to form the Christ. [...]

[...] Christ tried to tell men that he was everywhere, but they could not understand. [...] He was not born of a virgin, nor was his physical history any more factual than that once given for Zeus, or Apollo, or the Egyptian gods. [...]

[...] After a short time an earthquake occurred (in Romania), and the child was afraid that she had caused it. She was convinced that God had answered her prayer thusly.

(Jane was having some difficulty assuming a trance state. She said she was picking up negative and fearful emotions from me. My emotional condition at the was a mixture of embarrassment for I was about to be exposed; guilt that I was imposing on a friend, for I want to give to friends, not take from them; an utter fear that Seth was about to smash my hopes with the truth. [...]

(Long pause.) He was a woman. [...] Your Mr. Reed, then the sister, was hiding with the brothers here. [...] She was captured and gave the hiding place and could not then return to warn her brothers. [...] There was something done then to her right leg. A relative was responsible for an injury inflicted on her right leg connected with a horse.

[...] I was. [...] Now, thinking back on it, he was rather cruel to do that. I never was interested in boys my own age. [...] And I was too afraid of him to even speak to him.)

[...] There was a situation involving the three of them and he abandoned them in a way that he interpreted as a betrayal. The relationship between them then was different than it is now. [...] In this past of which I speak there was a physical difficulty suffered after he abandoned them; and if he leaves them now, he is afraid that this physical difficulty will return. [...]

[...] As she read she began going faster and faster, until I was quite surprised indeed. This was her best effort yet, even better than last time. To her, her reading was “very clear, though not quite normal,” but it was fast. [...]

(It was another good day in spite of some irritations. The day was rainy and warm—55 degrees. [...]

(The lunch tray was late—1:40 PM—and then it wasn’t what we’d ordered. [...] [Jane’s breakfast was what she usually gets, though.] She ate enough lunch to get full, after I’d gotten her ice cream, butter, and milk. [...]

[...] I opened the window wide, since she was quite warm. It was raining heavily, but warm. [...]

When he was in kindergarten his mother was just becoming ill. Now, dealing with small children, this simply was added to the fuel. [...]

A psychic, he thought, should be calm, untouched by physical events, highly disciplined, rather than spontaneous, such as he was, and sensitive to inner moods, which he was. [...] For to his subconscious, such a personality pattern represented immobility, and this was reflected in the physical symptoms.

Now discipline was somewhat overstressed from the beginning, with the psychic work. This was natural, largely. In his adolescence he was told by many to slow down, to use discipline, and the old adages returned.

He did feel that you had withdrawn from him as far as his writing was concerned, and he has a need for warm daily affection, which he felt you had also withdrawn, for varying periods, and that you did not care that he was feeling poorly. [...]

(The temperature was about 33 degrees as I left for 330. Jane had the window of her room wide open, and the place was still hot. [...] He was talking and using an occasional cuss word in a rather humorous way. [...] I knew that Jane was in the house somewhere, that she was walking perfectly all right, and that Jim had come to see her, not me. [...]

[...] It was that the body healed itself at a rate prescribed by its circumstances — that actually it could heal itself very rapidly if it was unimpeded. [...] The insight, which is hardly original, popped into my mind when I asked Jane why the healing was taking so long, in response to something she said. [...]

[...] She was with Ronald Reagan and one of his daughters. [...] She was very pleased in the dream at her success. She also said there was more she couldn’t remember.

[...] The “future” that he feared, he must understand, no longer exists — for it was composed of beliefs he no longer holds.

(“In which life was I a female?”)

(“What was my female name?”)

(“What was my last name?”)

(“What was the name of my oldest child, Frank Watts?”)

[...] Her reading was very fast. She was interrupted by people taking her vitals — temperature 97.3. By 3:57 she went back to the session — but now her pace wasn’t as fast and sure. [...]

[...] I said it was okay to slide over the edge, if you realized what was happening and took steps to not get carried away into a depressed mood by it. [...]

(Karina was mostly quiet today, although sounding off at times. Jane’s Seth voice was stronger and more positive than usual, I thought, with considerable emphasis at times.)

(4:37 p.m. I told Jane the little session was excellent, as indeed it is. [...] Jane was pleased too, and I reread it to her after supper.

(The day was much warmer — 30 degrees — at noon. [...] Jane was okay in 330, already turned on her back when I got there. [...]

He was not just listening, then, to recorded material, but he was himself the recorded information and a recorder upon which the experiences played.

[...] In the experience the kitten was in the hospital room, and there seemed to be adjoining rooms, as at 458 (the address of the apartment house we’d lived in on W. Water Street). This signified that Ruburt was building up similarities between present and past experience, so that the kitten, appearing in the dream’s present and past also, would indeed appear in the future.

[...] I was surprised and in a way sad for her, wondering how she would make out, and what problems the new place would have with her. [...]

The “inner” matter then was being released, remolded into better form. There is a connection of course between such inner manipulation and the actual physical body—so Ruburt felt physical sensation that was, however, not a part of what he thinks of as the body. It felt as if another body, oddly his, yet connected with the physical body—while not it—was being manipulated. Actually the body was being changed, but at a level beneath ordinary body awareness, at prematerial structure.

A few moments earlier he vaguely caught an image, as his mind, picking up inner information, translated it: he was being led to a physician’s office in the image. Actually at these other levels, a Sumari physician was helping him. His emotional response, vaguely, was quite legitimate. At last he was receiving some information and help from a level he had wondered about.

[...] Difficult to explain, yet at levels “beneath” matter, incipient matter was being manipulated. [...]

[...] And it was mistrust of that world, coupled with a mistrust of physical theories and alternatives, that partially caused his difficulties. [...]

“They were these: that the entire world with its organization was kept together by certain stories, like those of the Roman Catholic Church; that it was dangerous beyond all knowing to look through the stories or examine them for the truth, and that all kinds of taboos existed to keep us from doing this, since … on the other side, so to speak, there was an incomprehensible frightening chaotic dimension, malevolent; powers beyond our imagining; and that to question the stories was to threaten not just personal survival but the fabric of reality as we know it. So excommunication was the punishment, or damnation … which meant more than mere ostracism, but the complete isolation of a person from those belief systems, with nothing between him or her and those frightening realities … without a framework in which to even organize meaning. This was what damnation really meant. To seek truth was the most dangerous of well-intentioned behavior, then … and retribution had to be swift and sure.

On April 12 the space shuttle Columbia was launched into orbit around the earth, and I thought that Jane was complementing that obvious exploration of outside space by exploring inner space with the only vehicle she had available—her own mind. That same day, Seth agreed that her new book idea was a good one. [...] So the book was out in Spanish, we saw—but we were so preoccupied with Jane’s symptoms and related matters that we let the photocopies lie on a shelf. [...] The result was that on April 14, the day Columbia landed, Seth initiated a long series of sessions on both Jane’s own sinful self, and that quality in general. [...]

“I accept everything in the book, but I think I felt that if I was going to tell it like it was—and I was, was determined to—then I also needed more protection from the world, and began cutting down mobility again. [...] [James’s] attitudes and mine so often seem similar—that he was determined to be daring, press ahead no matter what, explore consciousness—while at the same time being attracted to safety, disliking controversy, wanting peace, etc. [...]

“The book was based on the idea that nature was against man; and that religion was man’s attempt to operate within that unsafe context. The feelings I was getting went even further, that religion or science or whatever weren’t attempts to discover truth—but to escape from doing so, to substitute some satisfying tale or story instead. [...] The idea of the stories was to save each man from having to encounter reality in such a frightening fashion…. [...]

(Late in the afternoon Jane said she’d have a session after all—I’d thought she was going to pass it up today, since neither one of us seemed at their best. I was more than happy to get out my paper and pen at my wife’s suggestion. Her Seth voice was good, but not all that loud. The door to 330 was half-open, but I didn’t even get up to close it before Seth came through. I could hear the usual traffic moving past, or stopping outside to wait for the elevators while Seth was speaking. [...]

(I told her I felt that today was somewhat of a resting day for both of us. [...] Jane made a few mild motions toward exercising her feet and arms, and so forth, and that was it. [...]

[...] She felt hot and uncomfortable, even though a window was wide open and the blower on [the air conditioning aspect of the blower has evidently been turned off for the winter by the hospital]. [...] It was a day of mostly rest, then. [...]

[...] The pizza was delicious, but it turned out that the wings were prepared with a hot sauce, meaning hot peppers, that not everyone could enjoy, Jane and I among them. [...]

[...] I hesitated, then asked if the name meant anything to anyone in the room; I was sure it did. Venice said that her sister-in-law’s name was Martha. [...] With the assurance that this was correct, I went into a trance to see what impressions I could get for the students. When I was finished the results were discussed by the students; they told me what impressions were hits, etc. [...]

[...] Martha’s husband was in the service.)

Air Force before it was the Air Force.

[...] And an A, with a large family and a particular picture of the family, old, three girls with large hair ribbons, two boys, several years older, picture taken on porch steps very early 1900’s. Perhaps in a city B or the name begins with B. And a sister, a career woman before this was general practice.

[...] I hesitated, then asked if the name meant anything to anyone in the room; I was sure it did. Florence said that her sister-in-law’s name was Martha. [...] With the assurance that this was correct, I went into a trance to see what impressions I could get for the students. When I was finished the results were discussed by the students; they told me what impressions were hits, etc. [...]

[...] (Yes, Martha's husband was in the service.) Air Force before it was the Air Force. [...]

[...] And an A, with a large family and a particular picture of the family, old, three girls with large hair ribbons, two boys, several years older, picture taken on porch steps very early 1900’s. Perhaps in a city B or the name begins with B. And a sister, a career woman before this was general practice. [...]

[...] Ruth had TB and was very ill.)

[...] Jane was well dissociated. This last delivery was much more rapid. [...] During this experiment, while reading some poetry aloud that the now-dead Father Trainor had often read to her when she was in high school, Jane’s voice had taken on an enormous male volume and strength. [...] Jane said it was Father Trainor’s voice, at times, or a close approximation. I can only say it was not the Seth voice; I had never known Father Trainor.

(Jane said that tonight her voice felt as though it was being projected out of her as she dictated, that she was swept along by energy other than her own, “like a sail filled with wind.” The voice was all around her, she said, yet she had no sense of invasion. She was very pleased at recognizing the feeling of the Father Trainor episode. [...]

[...] Jane was well dissociated. [...] It was something concerning what it was like to be an entity, yet so vague it couldn’t be put into words, really.

[...] The self at any given moment is not the self that it was, yet it is that which it was, since it is that which changed.

Your friend’s invitation was a direct answer to your need, which was telepathically received. The way, in other words, was provided. [...]

I knew it was approaching, and I gave you all the hints that I could in the past. I was not allowed to speak but in the most opaque of terms.

[...] The blockage was not only Ruburt’s, but your own. It was an emotional shield, and I gave you all the hints I could.

[...] It was indeed because you were so convinced that you envied Ruburt’s part. While you asked Ruburt to let me give you help for Ruburt’s condition, for some time the symptoms’ continuation was important to you for the reasons you now understand.