3 results for stemmed:orgasm
orgasm
lovemaking
rebel
demanded
mantras
Your husband’s attitude, certainly on the surface, has been understanding. Yet despite the surface attitude you feel, this is a duty, and you have set in your mind a bogeyman, called Orgasm. You have glorified what orgasm is—the unattainable, and therefore, the symbol of all the other qualities you want to achieve or think you should achieve, but do not have. The term, itself, sets up a barrier. In the spontaneous, normal natural feelings you have, you always question: How far am I going, how much am I giving? Always beginning with the idea that the orgasm for you is impossible to achieve. Your body has a set of contradictory doctrines—it cannot behave on its own. The negative taboos over the years have built up. Some of this can be immediately negated if you do one thing.
Forget the word orgasm. Become aware of what you do feel without questioning. Cease to strive for an orgasm. You are trying too hard in that direction, as with meditation. You are too earnest in that regard. In its own way hypnosis involves a psychic kind of play—meditation involves a psychic kind of play and lovemaking involves a psychic kind of play. You are too serious in your lovemaking, as in other fields.
You would be better off if you told yourself you didn’t care if you ever had an orgasm in your life. And if you could tell yourself that, and honestly, you would have no trouble in having an orgasm.
In refusing to have an orgasm you are showing your rebellion against authority. A certain part of you insists it is being spontaneous by withholding the orgasm—simply because it is demanded or expected.
