“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

[...] Definitely not imagination, anyhow; quite definite; I’d say, physical, though the “physical” feeling is where no physical part of me is. [...] This the most vivid experience to me of the night.

[...] (Don’t know if I felt the subjective feeling before or after their comments, but no suggestions as to hand was given by me, and I asked no questions, sitting with eyes closed, concentrating, rather in good trance, but aware of their comments. Sally asked me a direct question, and I couldn’t answer.) Here everyone in the room with the exception of Theodore who was in a poor position, reported the following:

[...] She sat kitty corner from me, diagonally in a clear line. She said that she definitely saw something green, like a green line, going up and down in front of me; also another color, I forget; and that this continued while the hand bit did. [...]

[...] Here Theodore said that he thought [he] saw a filmy whitish something move out from me in the same direction. In here also I concentrated on a ectoplastic arm without telling anyone and Theodore again reported without any suggestion from me that he thought he noticed a change in the same arm, and once thought it was about to rise. [...]

As I finished the first page, Rob came out, passed me and went into the kitchen. [...] Finally I managed to say, “Hon, don’t bother me.” It took great effort for me to withdraw that much energy away from what I was doing. [...] Later, Rob said that he never heard me speak to him and questioned whether I’d really spoken. [...]

[...] Now the half-full glass was beside me. [...] There was no feeling that any particular personality was giving me the information, yet there was the certainity that the words were being delivered from somewhere or someone outside my own reality. They didn’t seem to well up from inside me, but to be dropped down into my head.

[...] He tells me that I am to do something else and gives me a long, friendly lecture. [...]

[...] She wrote the dream down as usual, and called me on the phone to tell me about it. [...]

Finally I looked up and saw my mother in front of me. [...] With this, she sat right up and pointed at me. This reminded me of the way that Seth points at people sometimes. Apparently this worried me, for I ran to my body for protection. [...]

[...] The fact slowly dawned on me. This was the first time that the fear element wasn’t present for me. [...]

All this time Jane was beside me in bed. [...] I heard the sounds in my physical head, I believe, just beneath me. [...]

[...] Other people were there, and I was jubilant because no one saw me. [...] Can you see me? [...]

(The night of the session it literally swept me along toward the end and I want to make these comments while the affair is fresh in my mind. [...] There is a sense of great power sweeping me away and off. [...] I have no doubt that if Rob had questioned me I would have been able to describe the room. No one asked Seth to do so and, of course, all this time he was speaking through me in this voice of his. [...]

[...] Who was in the classroom, Seth or me? [...] [In a usual out-of-body state it would be highly difficult for me, alone, to communicate my perceptions until I returned.]

[...] Yet it is not Seth’s taking over that concerns me for when he does take over I am not afraid at all. [...]

(Again I’m led to see that good sitters are a definite benefit; bad sitters of course would simply be those that were distracting or pulled against me, I suppose—or those who demanded too much. [...]

(Yesterday while proofreading the Mass Events galleys I got the feeling that that book really bothered me, served as a focal point. [...] Before though, the fact escaped me that Seth had started Mass Events—representing his and my direct attack on official dictums—or so it seemed to me. [...] This idea also came back, reading a book on William James Peggy G. gave me for Xmas—his attitudes and mine so often seem similar—that he was determined to be daring, press ahead no matter what, explore consciousness—while at the same time being attracted to safety, disliking controversy, wanting peace, etc. [...] In fact Seth gave us Frameworks 1 and 2 stuff in there, to help me. [...]

[...] He surprises me with a great white sweater for an anniversary gift....)

(To Astor.) Now you have heard me before and listened to me before, and you have argued with me as this one over here now loves to do. [...]

[...] And when you look at me and want Seth to come through, and when you don’t want to know what Jane says but you want to know what Seth says, you are denying your own reality. [...] But without me Seth couldn’t speak, and without your inner selves you wouldn’t have the knowledge.

[...] You experience me as a particular personality, and you relate to it, and I, in turn, relate to you as the particular personalities that you think you are. That does not mean that what you see of my personality defines me, or that what you think of as your own personality defines you. [...]

[...] But if you’re waiting for me to have Seth come through, you should be as anxious to hear your own inner selves come through. [...]

[...] However, if you feel up to scribbling for me for a few more moments, I should like to add some more while Ruburt is letting me through, as I am not certain whether he would block me after the break or not.

(The man looked up at me. He appeared to see me, and to be not surprised at my position. [...]

(I do not know whether I finished or not; I have the feeling George Marshall promised to contact me. [It will be remembered that Seth had instructed Jane and me to ask this of whomever we managed to contact during psychological time.]

[...] Two town names in the northeast corner of Louisiana seemed familiar to me: Columbia and Cameron. [...] During the experiment I then recalled thinking that the name George Marshall gave me was a reasonable one for a town, and that it was the same as a town [or city] in Wyoming.

[...] Now were I a kind and well-known beloved uncle who has passed over, you could perchance see me, but for now you must be content with the little of me that I am able to portray through Ruburt’s personality. There should be occasions when Ruburt’s features will change to some considerable extent when I speak to you, but you will have to be content for now with that part of me you can sense. You will perceive more of me as time goes by. [...] But I tell you that you will perceive me more clearly than you do now. [...]

[...] Truth keeps you sitting upright in your chairs and the blood pounding in your veins and allows me to come to this room. [...] It is you as much as it is me and it is abundant and spontaneous and is not controlled. [...]

[...] I know this and it does not bother me so I don’t see why it should bother our friend (Ruburt) here. [...]

I have, to some extent, your histories before me and I see your giant steps and your tiny steps and I see where you trip. [...]

[...] (More than this, he let me use his real name, rather than hiding behind a pseudonym.) In his letter he said: In the session “I chose topics of conversation which were clearly of tolerable interest to Seth and considerable interest to me, and which by that time I had every reason to believe were largely foreign territory to Jane. Also … I chose to pursue these topics at a level of sophistication which I felt, at least, made it exceedingly improbable that Jane could fool me on; substituting her own knowledge and mental footwork for those of Seth, even if she were doing it unconsciously. [...]

[...] He told me that something very strange had happened, and since he was still upset about it, he thought he’d discuss it with me. [...] Bill told me that exactly a week before he had been awakened suddenly. [...]

On May 3, 1967, Peg and Bill Gallagher dropped in for our regular Monday night session, and as we sat around chatting, I told them about a letter I’d just received that amused me—and sort of outraged me at the same time.

[...] How did Seth help me do this? [...] One thing I knew: He was pretty tricky—sending me “out” without my prior conscious knowledge of what he was planning. [...]

It was indeed intuitive and psychic connections that brought me here, and it will be intuitive and psychic connections that finally cause Ruburt to accept me wholeheartedly.

[...] Ruburt wants to see me. He wants to sense me, and to believe that I exist in precisely those terms that I have told him.

[...] Regardless of what he believes about himself, his complete belief in me will only be arrived at intuitively and emotionally.

[...] Intellectual acceptance of me as a complete survival personality will follow the intuitive knowledge. [...]

[...] I asked for some ideas from my “natural spontaneous self,” and on August 5, 1980, I dreamed that a moving van with me in it was itself being moved by a larger vehicle ahead of some planned time. [...] I took that to mean that I would shortly be on the move again creatively, and to be prepared, so I had Rob help me move all my writing materials from the small breezeway where I’d finished The God of Jane, into the new patio back room, as a gesture of being ready to start over.

Something in his words struck me in a new fashion. [...] A change of balance — a vital but usually-hidden psychic action that instantly changed me and the afternoon.

[...] Now he told me he had one exposure left, and he wanted to take a snapshot of me to use it up.

[...] But the energy and power of this wave carries me above and below usual reality, sweeping me into contrasts that are microscopic and macroscopic by turns.”

This has nothing to do with me, except that working together in our sessions helps me come through more completely. [...] That additional energy does help me communicate however.

More “evidence” in quotes, of my independent existence will appear in direct proportion to your belief in it, and Ruburt’s. For as you believe in me you allow me to manifest more completely.

(Jane asked me if I noticed any physical changes in her face toward the last, since she was so strongly aware of Seth. I could only say that for the last few paragraphs the set of her mouth and chin had seemed to me to be somehow different, older, not quite like the set I am used to. [...]

(Just before 9 PM Jane had been telling me she was more aware of Seth’s presence preceding the session.)

[...] Her head kept dipping down and I kept calling her, and she kept telling me that every time I did so I interrupted her when she was “getting something.” To me it looked as though she was falling asleep each time. [...]

(Jane’s delivery had been sporadic in an odd way, her Seth voice subdued, making me feel that she could lose the session at any moment by slipping off into sleep. She put her glasses on, telling me that she’d felt my concern during the session. [...]

[...] After supper Jane told me to come out to the card table with the notebook at 8:15. [...]

[...] “Watch me—I’m afraid I’ll fall asleep. [...]

(“No one’s ever done anything like that for me,” she said. [...] It was decided I’d give her the cash tomorrow, rather than have her or the store send me the bill. [...]

[...] I’d taken the notebook with Chapter 9 of Dreams to the hospital with me. I was working on it when she told me to shut the door and get out the notebook for sessions.

[...] Jane was telling me that an aide who took care of her this morning, and who is living apart from her husband and has three kids, looked at a second-hand washing machine this noon but couldn’t afford the $130 cost. [...]

[...] This morning the ringing telephone got me out of bed at 5:45 a.m. It couldn’t be anyone except someone at the hospital, I thought as I ran out of the bedroom. [...]

[...] Then suddenly the answers came to me. Anna herself wasn’t really important to me. [...] In the dream the women hang out clothes in the yard … and Anna showed me the children’s closet at school, commenting on clothes. [...] I think I’d known the name all the while and in the dream translated it into action; the clothes episode would, then, really identify Anna and forsee the event in which she showed me the clothes closet.

Next, I floated above a car, which was driven by another me. [...] As I watched from my floating position, the “driving me” made an error at the light, and suddenly we ended up in the middle of a line of traffic. [...]

[...] Here Anna told me that she and her husband were househunting around Albany, New York. Later, in a free period, she showed me her first-grade classroom, specifically pointing out the closet and mentioning the difficulty involved in helping the children hang up their clothes.

[...] Each of my own precognitive dreams made a significant impression on me at the time and represented proof that I was moving in the right direction. [...]

[...] In any case, he has told me that he is treating me like a goody in that he does not feel you appreciated our last session. And so he tells me I should only come through and give you my greeting. [...]

Now, I am here to welcome back a certain member of our group who had to leave the group for several reasons—and read me correctly in this particular instance where my friend Ruburt did not read me correctly (addressed to Rachel). [...]

I will help each of you according to the extent to which you allow me to help you—and therein, indeed, lies a mighty tale. [...]

Believe this all has to do with the above, plus with a strange session held the night before last, in which through me the voice said it was sort of ‘beyond Seth’; the message coming from a higher portion of that personality; tremendous energy seemed to flow through me and the definite, thank God, certainty, that this came from beyond me, and was automatically translated into words at my end. [...]

During class, my jaw started to bother me, then badly, so I couldn’t get to sleep. [...] Hypnotism got me to sleep. [...]

[...] Just what we wanted; the enthusiastic interest really made me feel great. [...]

[...] He tried to help me break the trance, which was rather difficult. [...] Finally Bill and Peg took Rob and me for a ride in the cold night air, to snap me out of it.

(Then—to me suddenly—in my own voice and without Seth, I began to give impressions about Barb’s past life. [...] I mentioned Greenwich, Connecticut; I didn’t even know there was a Greenwich, in Connecticut, though I am familiar with Greenwich, NY, and it seems to me I thought there was one in Vermont. [...]

(To me, at least the checked-out information in the first part was excellent; the correct town and state, initials, the point about the second child—Barb just said yes, yes; but didn’t explain; and there was something else. [...] I was too upset and Rob was too worried about me to pick up such precise information—but will be curious as to whether or not any good points were given during the second, more charged segment.

[...] The way it was used the other night does frighten me to some degree surely. [...] A permissive attitude would make me more frightened. [...]

(3:36 p.m. The “ashamed” bit was new to me. [...] She said she’d felt ashamed of the panic at times, and agreed with me that if the shame was used to possibly suppress the panic, it — the panic — would last longer.

[...] Jane asked me to come down to 330 early, so I did. [...]

[...] She followed me down the hill and into the service station there, where I waved goodbye. [...]

[...] Our bill has run up again to around $55,000 — and here insurance hasn’t been sending me any checks. [...]

[...] I dreamed that I bought a new red, sporty-looking sedan car at a dealer’s. He wasn’t a very nice or pleasant man, younger than me, who swore a lot. [...] The obnoxious dealer told me that he’d sold the car to the family, and had set aside an identical green car for me.

[...] It was gone by the time I went to bed, but taught me that sometimes the old ideas and beliefs die hard. [...]

(I got really mad at him, and told him off in no uncertain terms, threatening, I believe, legal action if I didn’t get that car back that he’d promised me. [...]

(I didn’t eat lunch because Lynn had arranged a surprise birthday party for one of the nurses, and she invited me to share in the food. [...]