“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

This is because those expressions were natural in your family. Love would never be clearly expressed through a clear channel. It might be expressed through action that did not, however, directly involve love’s expression. Your father might make things for you, for example. But after your childhood state he avoided caresses or verbal expressions.

Intellectually he accepts it, but emotionally he yearns for that direct expression. The child may think “My teeth are fine, why yell at me to brush them?” Ruburt thinks “What is there that allows you to speak your concern more actively than your love?” He is verbally oriented. Words have rhythm—emotional rhythms, to which he is acutely attuned. You are saying “I love you. My art is, for whatever reasons, private. I respect it. It involves a method of expression, and a primary stance of my life, regardless of what it brings or does not bring. I am sorry that somehow I cannot use it in the way that you use your writing, and even in the way that I can use mine. When I think that others take advantage of you in monetary terms—government, publisher, or public—it makes me wonder why. I wish that my painting could bring you abundance in social ways also. I feel guilty sometimes when I paint for that reason. I know that you understand on deep levels. I wish I could express my love verbally, but if not, I will express it is this fashion.”

Your love since then has found more direct expression, and I am not obviously saying that that indirectness of expression is responsible for Ruburt’s symptoms—but only to state that your expressed concern in many instances, without the direct expression of love, reinforces the idea of threat or insecurity.

[...] As a result, any show of love is to some extent inhibited unless it can legitimately find expression sexually. In many instances love itself seems wrong because it must imply sexual expression at times when such expression is not possible, or even desired. Some people have a great capacity for love, devotion, and loyalty, which would naturally seek expression in many diverse ways — through strong enduring friendships, devotion to causes in which they believe, through vocations in which they help others. [...]

(10:05.) Give us a moment… On the one hand many of you have been taught that sexual expression is wrong, evil, or debasing. You have also been told that if you do not express your sexuality, you are displaying unnatural repression, and furthermore you are led to think that you must above all force yourself to enjoy this ambiguous sexual nature. [...] Yet women are taught that natural expressions of love, playful caresses, are inappropriate unless an immediate follow-through to a sexual climax is given. [...] They are taught to inhibit the expression of love as a weakness, and yet to perform sexually as often as possible. [...]

[...] It is being withdrawn from expression through government or law. It is being denied expression through meaningful personal relationships, and forced into a narrow expression through a sexuality that then will indeed become meaningless.

[...] When you thoroughly understand what is meant by the entire safe universe concept, then the physical, cultural climate is understood as a medium through which the ideal can be expressed—can be expressed. [...] The ideal seeks expression. It seeks those channels that it instinctively knows will yield expression. [...]

[...] Your challenge, then, if you believe in the photographs, is to send them out even if it means risking them, rather than refusing the expression of the ideal, which is always self-defeating. You cannot control expression. Beside, the expressed ideal may seek routes actually far more advantageous than ones you might have, planned for it.

(11:00.) You cannot inhibit such expression out of fear, without experiencing tensions. As you become accustomed to the idea of “reckless” expression of the ideal, then it is free to find “more perfect” expression. [...]

The direct expression through writing confuses him, for he is faced with a different kind of construction, say, than one might feel in a kindergarten, where blocks of wood carry the alphabet, and physical blocks might be moved around to form words. [...] The writing represents strong portions of Frank’s personality that are intently concerned with the expression of subjective feelings—feelings that appear nebulous at times because they cannot be expressed—so it seems to him—in a direct fashion.

The writing became a symbol for the expression of thoughts that could not be verbalized in childhood. [...] He wanted to express love for his father as a child far more openly than he felt his father would allow. [...]

When he learned to write, he thought of writing to express such thoughts, and was always tempted to use writing as an expression of those subjective feelings he felt were forbidden—not just directed toward his father, but feelings of which he felt his father would disapprove. [...]

[...] It made you feel inadequate, fearful of falling into cliches—or worse, trite expressions. It is good that naturally at least Ruburt is given to such expression, though that is not followed through as spontaneously as it could be. Ruburt, however, feels that it is not safe to express disapproval—the opposite of your habit—and so he feels threatened to some extent because your verbal expressions are so often of that nature, even if they are not directed to him, and he inhibits his own expression of any disapproval he feels, or frustrations. [...]

(10:07.) Now, my fine feathered friend: you never really trusted the verbal expression of feelings, while you trusted the verbal expression of ideas. You were particularly distrustful of the verbal expression of love, tenderness, or devotion. You felt it imperative to verbally express dissatisfaction or disapproval, generally, now—that is how words were used by your parents.

[...] The reasons, as given many times, lie in his background, where it was not safe to express disapproval or aggression. [...]

(10:29.) Physical objects are the result of another kind of expression. [...] Though you hear the words and recognize their appropriateness, and though they may more or less approximate an expression of your feeling, they are not your feeling, and there must be a gap between your thought and your expression of it.

[...] Words are methods of expression. [...] You are used to the idea that you express yourselves directly through words. [...]

(Long pause at 11:01.) You have heard the expression before, I am sure, that the environment expresses a particular individual’s personality. [...]

[...] You have a need to express your self—and I am repeating the word “express” quite purposefully (with a smile). You must feel that you are a self, and that you can express that self in the world that you know.

[...] However, her concern, her love and understanding, are seen only in the expression of her eyes and face. [...] Her concern and understanding also have a mental quality, as your own deepest feelings in those regards are expressed through art or writing indirectly, rather than through direct contact with others.

[...] When the dream gives you such an image, and the image becomes objectified, then you are of course showing a new part of yourself in the physical world, and bringing into expression through your physical hands the emotions that otherwise could not be expressed.

The expression of sexuality is considered male, while the expression of love is not considered manly. To some extent or another, then, the male feels forced to divide the expression of his love from the expression of his sexuality. [...]

Love exists whether or not it is sexually expressed, though it is natural for love to seek expression. [...]

[...] In such cases, sex becomes not an expression of love, but an expression of derision or scorn.

[...] Love seeks expression and creativity. Sexual expression is one way that love seeks creativity. [...] Love finds expression through the arts, religion, play, and helpful actions toward others. [...] It cannot be confined to sexual expression only, nor can rules be given as to how often normal adults should sexually express themselves.

Love can be expressed quite legitimately through the arts. [...] Many natural artists in any field normally express love through such creative endeavors, rather than through sexual actions.

[...] Again, here, sexual encounters are a natural part of love’s expression, but they are not the limit of love’s expression.

The expression of emotions in itself is an expression of action, of motion. To move requires first of all the expression of feeling, and the expression of any feeling makes room for still further motion. [...] Expression, rather than repression, is vital.

[...] He needs to realize that it is safe to express himself — and that expression will not bring about abandonment.

[...] But the idea is that it is safe to express himself, and that the true purpose of his life is indeed to express those characteristics that compose his personal reality.

There is a natural impulse to die on the part of men and animals, but in such circumstances [as we are discussing here] that desire becomes the only impulse that the individual feels able to express, for it seems that all other avenues of expression have become closed. [...] I always want to emphasize the importance of individual action, for only the individual can help form organizations that become physical vehicles (intently) for the effective expression of ideals. [...]

The idea [of democracy] expresses the existence of a high idealism — one that demands political and social organizations that are effective to some degree in providing some practical expression of those ideals (emphatically). When those organizations fail and a gulf between idealism and actualized good becomes too great, then such conditions help turn some idealists into fanatics. [...] The businessman who believed in Darwinian principles and the fight for survival, who justified injustice and perhaps thievery to his ideal of surviving in a competitive world — he suddenly turns into a fundamentalist in religious terms, trying to gain his sense of power now, perhaps, by giving away the wealth he has amassed, all in a tangled attempt to express a natural idealism in a practical world.

[...] Again, impulses are doorways to action, satisfaction, the exertion of natural mental and physical power, the avenue for your private expression — the avenue where your private expression intersects the physical world and impresses it.

[...] Sex is love’s expression, but it is only one of love’s expressions. Sometimes it is quite “natural” to express love in another way. [...]

[...] You imagine that sexual expression is the only one natural to love. Love, in other words, must it seems express itself exclusively through the exploration (humorously and deeper), in one way or another, of the beloved’s sexual portions.

This is hardly the only limitation placed upon love’s expression, however. [...] Love’s expression is furthermore permitted only between members of the opposite sex. [...]

[...] Permanent relationships become most difficult to achieve under such conditions, and often love finds little expression, while one of its most natural channels is closed off. Many children give their greatest expression of love to toys, dolls, or imaginary playmates, because so many stereotyped patterns have already limited other expressions. [...]

[...] Over a period of time, however, the expression of sex will follow the inclinations of the heart. These inclinations will color sexual expression, then. [...]

[...] Yet love naturally seeks expression, and one such expression is through sexual activities.

You also wanted your work to show and express those mysterious moments when the rivers begin to flow (underlined), the heart learns to speak. [...] You wanted to express in painting then the freeing of emotions—that could not be expressed unless first there had been repression, and those energies in full blossom that have nothing to do with age.

You naturally express your nature through your use of the channel of art. [...]

You wanted to express ideas in paintings that do not come in youth, and to merge a particular kind of understanding with a particular kind of form. [...]

The poetry allows for fullest possible creative expression in the full meaning of the word, art. It also siphons off, expresses and uses subconscious desires and moods and repressions, thus freeing the channels of the personal subconscious so that those deeper areas can find expression in psychic work.

[...] The stiff neck, when it occurs—the neck quite literally expresses the rigidity of attitude. [...] In this case, however, the subconscious recognized the danger and symbolically expressed through the organism, the ego’s intent. [...]

It provides for the deepest spontaneous expression of the subconscious, gives the ego a directive and sense of purpose, and develops the overall abilities of the personality, which in the past were completely denied, for lack of training and out of fear. [...]

Many people believe that it is dangerous to make themselves known, to express their own ideas or abilities. [...] In such cases you have two cross-purposes operating — the desire to express oneself, and the fear of doing so.

[...] If such a person begins to succeed, then he or she is forcibly reminded of the equally dominant need for lack of success — for again, the person believes that self-expression is necessary and desirable while also being highly dangerous, and thus to be avoided.

[...] Another person might express the same dilemma through the body itself, so that “getting ahead” was equated with physical mobility — so that it seemed that physical mobility, while so desired, was still highly dangerous.

[...] When you are pleased or joyful or have a pleasant comment, then these should also be expressed at the time, and in the fullness of those emotions, for such expression satisfies and pleases your own system, and also pleases others.

The system then enjoys its own spontaneous expression, and is flexible and therefore more receptive. Postponement of reaction can then lead to a pattern of rejection, for you are rejecting the expression of your own emotions. [...]

[...] It is extremely important that your dissatisfaction be expressed to your neighbor, and by you. Ruburt may join in, but it is important that you personally express this irritation, and feel its release for yourself in so doing.

For in that regard, you are simply deciding to cut down on value fulfillment further, and to limit expression, while the limitation of expression is a part of the problem. Expression is not the problem. A fear of expression is. [...]

I have said that in almost every case of severe dissatisfaction or illness the underlying reasons will not so much be found in the discovery or expression of buried hate or aggression—though these may be present—but in the search for valued expression of value fulfillment that is for one reason or another being denied. [...]

(Long pause.) Ruburt broke through both psychically and creatively—that is, the sessions almost immediately provided him with new creative inspiration and expression and with the expansions needed psychologically that would help fulfill his promise as a writer and as a mature personality. He was still left, however, with the beliefs in the Sinful Self, and carried within him many deep fears that told him that self-expression itself and spontaneity were highly dangerous. [...]

[...] It is not so much that the male and the female be considered equal as it is that the male and female elements in each person should be released and expressed. Immediately, many of you may be annoyed or alarmed, thinking that of course I mean sexual expression. That is a portion of such expression. But I am speaking of releasing within each individual the great human characteristics and abilities that are often denied expression because they are assigned to the opposite sex.

Ideally, the adult male or female would rejoice in sexual expression and find an overall orientation, but would also bask in a greater psychological and psychic identity that experienced and expressed all of the great human capabilities of mind and heart, which splash over any artificial divisions.

Before then there were various kinds of divisions of labor, but great leeway in sexual expression. [...]

In most such cases there is a lack of the normal range of emotional expression. Such persons often find it extremely difficult to express love, joy, or gratitude, for example, and this lack of expression is taken for granted by others, who do not see it in its true light, but think instead that the person is simply reticent.

[...] To encourage expression of that self appears foolhardy, for it seems only too clear that if the lid of consciousness were opened, so to speak, all kinds of inner demons and enraged impulses would rush forth.

[...] And when it is believed that the inner self is indeed a bed of chaotic impulses, then it becomes less and less possible for an individual to express normal ranges of activity. [...]