“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

(2:49 — Jane asked to see yesterday’s session, but didn’t read it — I did. [...]

[...] I asked if she had a cold — a poor suggestion — but instead of denying it, Jane said she didn’t know.

(I didn’t really understand her answer to my question, but she didn’t seem up to me pressing the point, so I let it go. [...]

[...] At first I thought she was tired and simply didn’t want a session, after the intense weekend we had just spent with Tam Mossman, from Prentice-Hall. [...]

(Jane didn’t see or hear anything different, yet felt that the kitchen, living room, and the studio seemed different somehow. [...]

[...] She didn’t necessarily feel Seth around, but could have held a session, she said. [...]

[...] Jane didn’t want to close her eyes, but she did, and waited.

[...] I could tell he didn’t understand that to be a creative leader one didn’t follow others, but went out on his own. [...]

[...] One thing is certain: They didn’t write books or develop an original philosophy of their own. [...]

[...] But I can’t say that I didn’t know that.

[...] I told Jane I didn’t know whether to attach any significance to the two Helen Parks or not. [...]

[...] She didn’t know why she was in the field; she went back to the house and saw herself lying on the floor. [...]

[...] She didn’t think anything of her parents.

[...] She replied that she didn’t care to, that he remarried too soon after her death.

(Malba said that on her plane she was supposed to learn things, to be taught, but she didn’t know how. [...]

[...] I didn’t want to be bothered; now that I’d recently agreed to do some such shows, everyone it seemed would start calling. [...]

I hemmed and hawed, decided after talking with Rob that I really didn’t want to do any shows at all, so I wrote one letter so informing Prentice. [...]

[...] I felt defensive and guilty; he was trying emotional blackmail, and I didn’t want to see him. [...]

[...] The next day I learned from Peg that he’d come by bus, had to stay the night, didn’t have much money—his reality, I reminded myself firmly, not mine. [...]

[...] Roe didn’t show up either, and Peggy didn’t mention it, nor did Peggy dwell on Jane’s bedsores. [...] I didn’t ask Seth to comment, but should have. [...]

[...] [I didn’t tell Jane the hospital part of my suspicions, though.]

(She also recounted how she didn’t have to take gym in school because of her periods, and how Marie said Del had bad eyes because of the syphilis and couldn’t read. [...] She felt the men didn’t pay her serious attention at the science-fiction conference 27 years ago because she was a woman. [...]

[...] In fact, today was the first day in 330 that I didn’t answer at least a few letters from readers. [...]

[...] Jane was frightened at having her periods and talked to a nun about all of it — and the nun would have her own hangups, probably; Jane didn’t say, or perhaps remember.

[...] I didn’t remember Jane telling me this before, though she might have.

[...] Perhaps Curt didn’t have much time to spare either, for when I did get a minute to talk, I saw him going out the front door. There is a sort of similarity here, then, beside the ordinary synchronicity: for if we didn’t get to see the Lords at all, I didn’t get to talk to Curt much beyond saying hello and shaking hands. [...]

[...] But they didn’t show up due to a misunderstanding re dates: Cec thought they were to visit next Saturday evening—the 13th. [...]

[...] “Just for kicks,” I told Jane, “I almost asked Seth to say something about Israel and Iraq, but I didn’t....” [...]

[...] This at once compressed her ideas of the time in which to do anything, although I didn’t feel any pressure. [...]

[...] I didn’t believe or disbelieve it. [...]

[...] I must be more negative than I thought after all this time, for I didn’t believe her when she said she wasn’t going to die now. [...]

(I should add that I didn’t mean I wished she’d die so that I’d be free. [...]

(I’d like to add that while there’s life there’s hope, and that as Seth has said many times, one who doesn’t want to die — as Jane said the other day she didn’t — won’t for any reason. But I told Jane that I couldn’t ask her to do something she didn’t want to do. [...]

(Jane said she didn’t want to hear it when I asked her if she wanted me to read it back to her. [...]

[...] Jane didn’t ask for these, but left it up to me to pick out something to read.

(After I had her situated on her side, I sat back for my usual nap, but didn’t actually sleep much. [...]

[...] You didn’t know how to open it further, and if I may say so, you didn’t know how to close it. [...]

[...] This sensation was so strong that I put down my sandwich and took off my glasses, because I literally didn’t know what might happen next. [...]

Looking back now, the next morning, I think the possibility crossed my mind that some psychic effects were being felt, but, actually, I was so startled that I didn’t think much of anything.

I didn’t tell Jane about this at the time, but in a recent session, Seth referred to it and said that I’d been calling — psychically — for help because my back had been bothering me then badly. [...]

[...] Jane was still in trance but didn’t appear to be bothered. [...]

[...] I was still surprised at the quick ending; I didn’t even say good night to Seth. [...]

[...] We didn’t think her not looking at it would interfere with her having questions. [...]

[...] She didn’t have a session. [...]

[...] But when she tried to picture herself doing the same things at 1730 Pinnacle, she didn’t do nearly as well. [...]

(“He didn’t seem to do too well with the suggestions you gave in the last session—that he try imagining others commenting on how well he looked and was doing—”)

[...] Jane didn’t know either. [...]

(Jane didn’t eat a whole lot of lunch. [...] No one showed up with food for me, though, so I ate what Jane didn’t want off the tray — half a roast-beef sandwich, with mustard. [...]

[...] I tried to do some mail, but didn’t get far. [...]

[...] Then I explained that my next question was simply whether she could place herself in that state with Seth present, even though I wasn’t there and Seth didn’t speak. [...]

[...] Pete didn’t call, and I didn’t do a damned thing except get up, clean up, get the paper and feed the cats, eat breakfast and go to work marking up Chapter 4 of Dreams, which I finished typing a couple of days ago. [...]

(Jane said that maybe Seth would return later and talk about the dream, but this didn’t happen. [...]

[...] Margaret Bumbalo invited me over for supper, and I didn’t know whether to accept or not, since I wanted to be sure I got this session typed. [...]

[...] To my knowledge, I’d never had a psychic experience in my life, and I didn’t know anyone who had. [...]

[...] I didn’t even have time to call out to Rob.

When I came to, I found myself scrawling what was obviously meant as the title of that odd batch of notes: The Physical Universe As Idea Construction. Later the Seth Material would develop those ideas, but I didn’t know that at the time. [...]

As it was, I didn’t know what had happened, yet even then I felt that my life had suddenly changed. [...]

[...] “I didn’t feel good when he came in.” [...] Walter didn’t stay too long, as noted, because I’d asked him not to. [...]

(“I didn’t trust myself up there at the top of that thing,” Jane said. “That was the first time I had trouble with my physical body, that I didn’t trust it. [...]

(We almost didn’t have the session. [...]

[...] I noted there that I didn’t recall her telling me about such feelings.

[...] I looked the book over today, but I didn’t expect anything on it before next week. I didn’t know I’d get anything to do with Christ. I’ll bet that’s why he didn’t say it was book dictation until the end of the session….”

As for Jane: So many physical changes had taken place in her body today, she was so “out of it” by suppertime, that she didn’t know whether or not she could even have a session. [...]

“I thought it was [book] dictation right away,” I laughed, “but I didn’t ask.” [...]

[...] Jane had told me earlier in the week that she didn’t think Paul had received a vision or communication from Jesus Christ.

(Jane didn’t call last night. [...]

(I got really mad at him, and told him off in no uncertain terms, threatening, I believe, legal action if I didn’t get that car back that he’d promised me. [...]

(I didn’t eat lunch because Lynn had arranged a surprise birthday party for one of the nurses, and she invited me to share in the food. [...]

[...] I’m probably not quoting her completely or correctly here, since I didn’t write down what she told me. [...]