“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

(She ate a rather skimpy lunch. At 2:59, as we talked, she began to speak about being scared and panicky again. Half crying and moaning in no time, arms and hands moving from where I’d propped them up. She did say her panicky feelings had to do with the session about her mother Marie yesterday, and a dream she’d had last night. Very good, I said, but she couldn’t actually pin down the source or subject matter for her panic today. She continued half crying. “Read me — read me yesterday’s session. I don’t know what I’m doing,” she cried, when I asked her if she was thinking about Marie.

(Tearfully, moaning, at 2:58: “I’m going to try, Rob, to have a session. I’ll do the best I can … I don’t know if I can … All right, I’ll try.” Then, teary, with many pauses, eyes open most of the time:)

He will not die, despite himself, so to speak. His living is the most natural thing in the world. He is, therefore, not abandoned. The mysterious, creative healing energies do sustain him. Forget the knees as much as possible, and the seeming impediments.

(3:03. She was still teary, her voice often choked with emotion. She took the Darvoset to help calm her down. It was raining heavily, just as it had done periodically yesterday afternoon. Reading today’s session, so far, helped. Carla had said last night when she called that Jane was still doing the motions she’d begun yesterday. Now Jane told me a friend had visited earlier. When the motions had started up, Jane had asked her to leave, since she hadn’t wanted to do the motions in front of someone else.

Remind him of his kindnesses to your apartment-house neighbor, Miss Callahan, to his many students, and of his love for you. Also remind him that he did not deal with malice toward his own mother. Do remind him affectionately and often that for many years he loved his mother deeply, and that his own existence made his grandfather experience a love that was a light in his later years.

These elements are all living and highly potent in the affairs of his life — so that in no way do his relationships with his mother (pause) become any isolated concentration, existing apart from the other affairs of life. Remind him that Ruburt loves nature, and always has. Nature loves Ruburt, and always has.

(After a late supper I went over to see the Bumbalo family. Margaret and I hugged. She almost cried. I could tell they’d all been crying. Yet they had the Olympics on TV, and John offered me a scotch and soda. There was much laughing and joking too. Margaret asked me if I’d be an honorary pallbearer at Joe’s funeral, and I said sure. She said I didn’t have to do anything. The first thought that crossed my mind was that I didn’t have a suit to wear — just my corduroys. I didn’t mention this.

(This is the first time my wife has ever asked me to come at a different hour. I see it as a good thing, since I’d told her to do so, and that it may serve as excellent therapy and reinforcement of new beliefs.)