“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

(Jane was again very uncomfortable today when she lay on her back. This pattern has persisted for a number of days now. “How can you be more uncomfortable now, when the bedsores are healing, than you used to be?” I asked some time ago. She didn’t know. My own eventual conclusion was that more was involved — that it had to do with her attitudes and beliefs.

(The day was warm — in the 60’s — and rainy at times. The windows were wide open so that traffic noise hit us. Down the hall somewhere a woman was shouting periodically — a display that took a lot of work and energy after a few hours. One of the nurses called her “a pain in the ass,” then laughed when she added that the woman did have hemorrhoids. But to me her unintelligible shouting signaled more than a physical affliction.)

The idea of Mother’s Day made him half resentful and half sorrowful because of the poor relationship between him and his mother (long pause), and he had hoped for further improvements in time for his birthday.

(I felt depressed after today’s session, for it seemed to me that Jane still hasn’t shaken her fears, especially her distrust of her own body and its processes, after all this time. I saw the birthday/Mother’s Day hassle as only the latest wrinkle in a 20-year cycle of reasons for the symptoms. The question isn’t why she’s so uncomfortable these days, but why the body, the psyche, has chosen to endure those symptoms for so long.)