“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

(This is Jane’s first session in five days — her longest recent break.

(My own position may be too simple, but I do not believe a body can be coaxed to good health by others, or sessions, or whatever. I told Jane that if she ever improves, it will be because certain parts of her give permission. She said through tears that she wants to get well, but that meant little to me, I’m afraid, since her state flatly contradicts such protestations. I also said that on a larger, more inclusive scale I can understand a person choosing a life of illness, say, in order to learn and to explore consciousness in certain ways. I think this is what she has chosen to do so far in life. In ordinary terms her behavior is an extreme — and I added that when I asked Seth about this, he countered by talking about the extremes of poverty in Africa, say, but he said precious little about Jane per se. I took that as another sign of resistance. Nor did Jane ever return to the subject. I concluded that my asking questions was a waste of time, and stopped doing so. I have no plans to resume, for I always ended up feeling that without my pushing, Jane — either with or without Seth — just would never deal with them. And that’s been the case. Most of the private sessions we have in those 40 loose-leaf notebooks, about her symptoms, are the result of my pushing her for answers, not the other way around.

(4:08 p.m. I read the session to Jane. Seth obviously didn’t return.

(The session reinforced much of what I wrote in my notes before it was held — that fear rules, and whether by choice or not, has for many years. But then, ultimately it had to be chosen. I found myself thinking as the session progressed that what’s needed is not the allaying of any current fears about going home, but the more basic ones that are “responsible” for the whole situation to begin with. Then the current fears would melt away, I think. I even think that when Seth told Jane a few weeks ago that her broken right leg could straighten itself out, this generated more fears right there — that it couldn’t do so, and so forth. I also think that when an individual wants protection or shielding from the world badly enough, he or she will go to any length to get it.)