“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

(Jane’s Seth voice was again on the quiet side, her delivery quite slow at times.)

(I described my dream of the other day, which I’d already told Jane about: I’d been sitting on our couch with Jane and our neighbor, Joe Bumbalo. Joe was living with us; the three of us were eating supper as we watched a program on TV. Margaret, Joe’s wife, wasn’t in the dream. Briefly, at the time of the dream, I’d wondered if it hinted at something happening to either of them — Joe or Margaret, that is.)

(4:33 p.m. “That makes that a pretty good little dream, then,” I told Jane, for in the dream she, too, had been fully recovered. Jane did remember my telling her about the dream earlier this week. Then she said, her voice breaking, “It wasn’t until the other day that I really realized — felt — just how far I’d strayed from normal motion, or life, after all this time. Now I want to get back to it so bad. I just have to use it, instead of letting it — life — use me …”

(Whereupon I reminded her that she didn’t have to use anything, as per the session for February 1 that I’d read her today. She only had to get out of the way of her own body’s natural ability to heal itself. I was amazed at the way her body was still trying to right itself after all of these years. How cruel we could be to ourselves, I thought, and this reminded me of my old questions about why the body consciousness itself didn’t just rebel at times and refuse to let itself be so beaten down by erroneous beliefs. Seth has said a little about this in response to a question of mine, but we need much more. Nor has he ever referred to my question about whatever reincarnational influences might be operating with Jane.

(I read this session to Jane after supper. She then admitted that she’d become frightened today because she’d been coughing up mucous occasionally. And she became even more frightened after the session. I was frightened by her reactions — appalled that after all we were trying to do, she still reacted to something beneficial — the coughing — as something to be scared of. The implications took my breath away, and I became depressed with thoughts that I didn’t see how she was ever going to make it, ever going to break that cycle of fearful response to the world and her place in it, her fear of being attacked, of life itself. I wondered what we’d been trying to do all of this time.