“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

(Jane was “blue and nervous” this morning, but talked herself out of it. She ate a good lunch. I had yesterday’s session typed, and she tried several times to read it without success — even after I’d given her eyedrops, she just couldn’t do it today. I finally read the session to her, finishing at 3:33.

(Afterward, as we talked, Jane agreed to look in the mirror, which I have had available in 330 for some months. At first she was afraid to, but it went well — with only a little catch in her throat she faced herself, and did very well at it. The main point we agreed on was that using a mirror meant one less important hassle to deal with; she’d be hiding that much less from herself.

(Jane tried to read the session again, but soon gave up. I remarked that if she had a session today I’d like it to be on what we’d talked about before I left last night — her right leg, and related challenges. I also wanted Seth to comment on the last paragraph I’d written for yesterday’s session. I thought I had a good idea there, and Jane agreed. She also wants me to bring in an eyebrow pencil, so she can use that with her lipstick.

(Long pause.) It may be far more pleasant to be good-humored all of the time — but in Ruburt’s situation the fairly infrequent periods of blueness do indeed operate therapeutically, so that he is able to express those feelings through tears, and therefore relieve the body of expressing the same feelings through additional symptoms.

(Long pause at 4:10.) This is now, at least, a natural casting-off of old doubts and fears, but in such a way that they are recognized and then let go.

(Long pause.) The changing condition of the eyes shows the kind of cycles that occur: the upper edges, so to speak, of improvements continue, so that each new improvement is, obviously, superior to the last. But in the meantime there is much variation, unevenness, and times when the vision is quite unclear. Those changes do indeed seem mysterious. Ruburt is not looking at his own eyes all of the time — so that mysteriousness is somehow taken for granted. He understands so little about the eyes’ operation to begin with, that he does not bother to figure out, or try to figure out, the order that such improvements should take, or how they should happen.

I may or may not return — but know indeed that I am present and approachable, and that I hold both of you in my attention.

(4:25.) It is very difficult to explain, because what actually happens is sometimes so directly contrary to what seems to have happened. You do not simply change, or enlarge, your ideas or beliefs about the past — but you change the events of the past themselves for yourself, and sometimes for others also.

(A moment later Shawn Peterson came in to say hello. I made the mistake of asking how her husband was, since I’d thought about asking yesterday, but hadn’t. Shawn launched into a long account of her husband’s latest troubles. Yesterday the two of them had spent a day at the hospital in Sayre. With the best intentions, her account reflected all the negative beliefs about illness that Jane and I had come to expect in the hospital setting. After Shawn left, I read to Jane her material from 4:25.)