“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

(As she ate Jane said, “The noises in my mouth are real loud — you’re not used to it.” When she sipped beer, she felt the cold liquid descend inside her body, but displaced to the right of her esophagus. She recited a list of opposing feelings in her own body that she was simultaneously aware of in her “bigger body”: Her right foot was very cold, her back very hot … I got her a sweater, for our living room had cooled off. The February night was very cold.

(“Yes. Good night.” 12:06 A.M. Jane still felt somewhat massive. A few notes added the next day: She slept restlessly, and found herself “giving material on probabilities just about all night.” She woke up often, and at such times was relieved to discover that she hadn’t been holding a session that I wasn’t recording. As it was, she laughed, the material was still “safe” — we’d get it at a regular session.

In a very small measure you can see how this works when you think of your mother in, say, her last years, and compare your idea of her with those of [your brothers] Linden and Richard. She was a different person to each of you. She was herself; but in the interweavings of probabilities, while certain agreed-upon historic events were accepted, she admitted into her reality whatever portions of your probable reality she chose. Each of you had a different mother.

(Long pause at 11:05.) Part of Ruburt’s feeling of massiveness comes from the mass experience of the body, existing all at once. Therefore to him the body feels larger. Calculations impossible to describe occur, so that from this basic unpredictability you experience what seem to be predictable actions. This is only because you focus upon those actions that “make sense” in your reality, and ignore all others. I am not speaking symbolically, of course, when I say you died as a youngster. Nor was any harsh reality forced upon the mother by the dying child, for that portion of your mother was the part that regretted having had the child.

[...] (Several years later, Jane was to list nine such inner senses in Chapter 19 of The Seth Material.) Jane said that upon coming slowly awake from her nap she’d had the very peculiar feeling of ‘growing larger.’ The laughing phrase she used was that she’d felt as ‘big as an elephant.’ Her boundaries of awareness seemed to have expanded. [...]

[...] While she’d been in this unusual state, that area was much enlarged — she used the words ‘infinitely large’ to describe it. Jane said it was as though her eyes had actually moved further apart to create this expanded field of awareness, of infinite black. [...]