“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

(I’m no longer angry, for instance, although I was up until quite recently. That has passed, but Jane is in poor shape; her decubiti are much more aggravated, and have been for some time. She feels terrible most days. I still want to know what role the sinful self—to use the appellation Seth gave us—plays in all of this, for I’m more convinced than ever that it is still the dominant force behind all of it. An oversimplification, no doubt, but essentially true, I think. As I said to Jane this morning during our long discussion, I still want to know why one portion of the personality would want to drive all of the rest before it, even to the point of destruction, and perhaps even beyond. Surely there’s no future in that for the personality, at least in mundane terms.

(I remembered that Seth once said that if a dying person decides to live after all, they’ll seize upon the tiniest hope, and respond. I thought that situation analogous to ours, for I can think of nothing left to rely upon except ourselves. I reminded Jane that I was interested in sinful-self material above all else. She agreed, I guess, but I know much other material will be forthcoming along with it, as it should. We’ll have to wait and see.

(Hal Williams’ treatment of Jane helped her considerably. It’s interesting to note that after last June’s session Rusty and Hal had also visited us, and he had done the same thing for Jane then. I’d also made a note that they would visit again in the fall. So they showed up today as we decided to resume sessions. [I should note that they returned on Sunday afternoon, as planned, and that Hal demonstrated upon my own body how to treat Jane. His treatment left me so relaxed that I almost fell asleep, or so it seemed. I still feel the relaxing effects even as I type this material. It also helped Jane. Jane’s hands and knees have, I think, showed considerable improvement since we began the vitamin therapy, even with all the interruptions that treatment has had. The swelling seems to have left her hands completely. The fingers of the right hand are opening up from their clenched position, and the flesh has softened considerably. I’m hoping and trusting that such beneficial changes will continue to take place.

The sessions are available, then. I still operate as I always have, so there Ruburt can set his mind at rest. As for direction, and the deep exploration of events, I will leave that for tomorrow evening as a starter, for obviously we cannot handle it all in an evening’s time at any rate. I will have plenty to say to you both, hopefully that will prove of quite practical benefit.

(Jane had heard the fireworks next door, which had only sounded for two brief intervals. All was quiet. I read her the session. “It’s a start,” I said, and she agreed. I can’t wait for the next one. The alternatives are too painful and unnecessary to consider.)