“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

(I went over to the Infirmary’s office with them after the meeting to get a bunch of papers Kim wanted to give me, because doing it this way would save me an extra trip sometime later. While there I expressed quite plainly my opinion that Jane and I were being manipulated, that I was getting mad at everybody. I wanted her to get that message, and told her Pete H. would be calling. She gave me a lot of figures I only partially understood. She also asked me about Jane’s assets. When I gave a rough estimate, she said that ruled out applying for something called Hill-Burton funds for payment toward the insurance bill, I believe. In other words, one has to be indigent before any help is offered, it seems.

(“That’s the system,” Connie Lido said when I told her Fred hadn’t told us he’d signed that form. Over in her office, Kim Evans said that the report on Jane noted that her joints were “frozen.” and I explained to her that that wasn’t the case at all—another instance of lack of communication. She also explained something to me about indigence—how, after a certain period of time Jane and I would be considered separate people so that she could qualify Medicaid payments, I believe—and that, even if they got after me to make up those payments, I could refuse to do so. This is certainly garbled—but she made some notes on it, and I’ll be giving them to Pete, or at least telling him about them when I call him in the morning.

(“I figure on calling Pete tomorrow morning and telling him about today’s events, but I don’t want to change probabilities by dwelling upon them. At the same time, I get angry when I think we’re being manipulated, and so forth. I feel a conflict there. I don’t want to change our present situation here in the hospital when we’re getting results, so I don’t really know what to do....”)

(I did call Pete at 9:00 AM. and outlined as best I could yesterday’s events. I’m to mail him all the forms and figures I got from Kim Evans. Pete said that at the moment he was as confused as I was. “These people all speak their own languages,” he said, “and if you’re on the outside you don’t know what they’re saying.” Too true.

(Pete surprised me by saying that he’d talked to Fred Kardon yesterday, here in town. Fred, he said, was on the defensive. Pete ended up getting mad at him—for Fred contradicted himself by saying that Jane required acute care, but that all the other facilities in town said they rejected her for that very reason. I don’t know whether I’m correct in this interpretation or not, but Pete said Fred was evidently trying to protect himself. So’s everyone else, I said. I told Pete about Fred signing that form on November 18, saying Jane didn’t require acute care.

(I kept the session in mind, so I didn’t go so far as to tell Pete to go all out and start suing everybody—although we’ve discussed litigation re the insurance. But what I want Pete to do is to thoroughly familiarize himself with all facets of our “case,” so that we can then make some intelligent decisions. I didn’t even tell Pete that, but will probably end up doing so. Now I don’t know whether to call Fred and get mad this afternoon, or what, considering the material in the session. The session may be acting as a healthy brake on my going too far, too quickly. If so, I’m grateful.

(Pete also wants a copy of Steve Blumenthal’s last letter, so I’ve made a copy of that to mail him with the Infirmary material today. I’ll stop at the post office to pick up some Christmas stamps. What’s Christmas?)