“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

(Frank Longwell visited yesterday noon. During one of our discussions yesterday, also, I mentioned to Jane some of my own ideas about the power of the Sinful Self, according to Seth’s material. For even though it was seemingly somewhat isolated or cut off from the personality’s creative processes, as well as from many current events and ideas, still it had that power to so drastically influence the physical body. This of course implied strong connections with the body as it operated in daily physical reality. The two states almost seemed contradictory, I said to Jane, and hoped that Seth would go into that matter eventually.

Everything I have said about the Sinful Self applies. The Sinful Self is not the “villain”. It is not a case of one portion of the personality inflicting difficulties on other portions so much as you have a pattern of reactions to various forces in the personality—which to some extent end up serving certain purposes. There may be very unpleasant side effects.

Illnesses are in their way inadequate methods of solving problems. Ruburt had strong elements of personality still caught up in the beliefs of what I have called the Sinful Self. At the same time, for many reasons, he had the idea that he was expected to be not merely a well-adapted natural person, but a kind of superself, solving other people’s problems, being a public personality, a psychic performer, and so forth. There was a vast gulf between those two extremes—one that was bound to cause strain and effort and misunderstandings.

The entire Sinful-Self syndrome should remind him of his own personal background, so that he can see the growth of his personality, for in the large he has of course grown out of that framework. If he had not, he would not have done any of his creative work, and in the light of his background his achievements become even more outstanding. The symptoms are the result of the strain between the still-lingering beliefs from childhood, clashing with the unrealistic goals of being a kind of superself, for in the light of that kind of superself image so much is expected that almost any achievement is taken for granted.

(Long pause at 9:48, one of many.) It almost dissolves in the imagined light of super-expected performance. This generates a sense of disapproval, of course. It also tends to being about a bigger division between those two images of the self. (A one-minute pause.) We want to speak more of reactions between elements of the personality, so I do not want you to settle upon one portion as the villain. At the same time, I do not want to play down the unfortunate aspects of the beliefs connected with the Sinful Self. Those aspects are at the psychological core of your civilization, and at the very heart of your organizations, whatever they are.

To some extent Ruburt’s panic is also the result of trying to live up to an impossible image, while forgetting his own personal background, and by expecting himself to behave as if that background was unimportant. (Long pause.) He was a person taught to believe that expression was somehow wrong. Despite that he became an excellent writer. He uses expression constantly. He expected himself to be a public personality—that is, he felt the responsibility to be one, as if that had always been a goal, when of course it had not been.

(Long pause at 9:58.) He had been shy with people, shy about reading his own poetry, though determined to do so, yet he felt that he should become this public personality, or to perform. I keep trying to think of examples so that you know what I mean. The entire idea of responsibility has been over-stressed. The creative work was expected not only to be creative, imaginative, intuitive, to contain the highest elements of conceptual thought, but must also be capable of solving the most concrete physical problem, tuned with some magical tuning fork so that it could serve almost any purpose required of it.

The symptoms were the result of strain placed upon the personality by the conflicting pulls of various beliefs—beliefs that did not fit the basic natural makeup of his personality or temperament.

(Long pause.) He was also expected to be an excellent businesswoman, a fine artist, an extrovertish personality, to shine in any company, an introvert capable of greater spiritual exertion. He expected too much of himself. At the same time, of course, to some extent he blocked his own natural motion (underlined), which followed directly from his own motivations and abilities, his own desires and instincts.

He may not want to be a public personality, but he does enjoy expression. He does enjoy his own brand of teaching. Part of all this is due to the original aspect of your work itself, which does not have any well-defined definitions.

The panic is dissipating through varying stages of expression. Expressions of love and support on your part are invaluable. So that Ruburt understands that you love him for the person that he is—not for some better self that he should be. He is beginning to move ahead again creatively, which will also be physically reflected. The two are related.