“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

To some extent Ruburt’s panic is also the result of trying to live up to an impossible image, while forgetting his own personal background, and by expecting himself to behave as if that background was unimportant. (Long pause.) He was a person taught to believe that expression was somehow wrong. Despite that he became an excellent writer. He uses expression constantly. He expected himself to be a public personality—that is, he felt the responsibility to be one, as if that had always been a goal, when of course it had not been.

He may not want to be a public personality, but he does enjoy expression. He does enjoy his own brand of teaching. Part of all this is due to the original aspect of your work itself, which does not have any well-defined definitions.

(A one-minute pause at 10:11.) You have always been do-it-yourselfers, so your strengths and weaknesses become quite noticeable. (Long pause.) Who can say when determination ends up in stubbornness? (Something I’ve wondered about at times.) Ruburt has been facing the feelings of panic, however, that he had buried. They may not be pleasant, but they are expressions, often enough of valid-enough questions and fears that were overlooked or pooh-poohed as insignificant or foolish in the light of this superself image, who was expected to have no doubts, no fears, only flawless performance.

The panic is dissipating through varying stages of expression. Expressions of love and support on your part are invaluable. So that Ruburt understands that you love him for the person that he is—not for some better self that he should be. He is beginning to move ahead again creatively, which will also be physically reflected. The two are related.