“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

You are free-lancers, so that you do not deal with a regular, specified financial state, of course. To that degree your livelihood depends upon many elements. You are never certain of your income’s exact amount per month, say, as you would be if you had salaries. The very nature of the work that you are involved in implies uncertainty—and this aside from psychic activity. That is, writing and painting themselves embark you upon uncertain routes. Again, they are not products with known specifications and measurements. The psychic work brings in a further extension, both of a do-it-yourself element, and the creative uncertainty.

(Long pause.) To some extent it means that you try to live your lives in accord with a philosophy not yet completed, methods not yet completely achieved or stated, and this of course involves you with uncertainty. Ruburt for example feels obligated to tell correspondents with health difficulties to see the established authorities, certainly those with serious illnesses. (Long pause.) He suggests that others follow their own intuitional material, while at the same time holding on to the established frameworks upon which most people depend.

(9:17.) It was therefore beneficial when Adams gave the “diagnosis” on Ruburt’s eyes. Now because of these uncertainties—financial, creative, and psychic—other certainties become highly important, as a framework for such seeming unpredictability. You value therefore the certainty of your love for each other. The certainty of a more or less dependable environment, and Ruburt therefore valued, and values, the certainty that existed for many years with the Prentice connection.

The paragraph he read concerning your enduring love for him this evening struck him deeply. (Long pause.) There is no doubt that for many reasons given he feared the dependability of your love (long pause, eyes closed), if his actions did not please you. That fear had its roots in his childhood, and of course in the male-oriented culture. To some extent then he felt even the safety of your relationship threatened when you became irritated, say, with Prentice. He became frightened in particular when he feared that his relationship with Prentice might make you ill.

People react differently to stress. Ruburt’s reaction to stressful situations was a repressive one: he did indeed often feel in a steady state of some alarm. Because of other beliefs it seemed that it was not safe to relax. The applied tension itself in that framework came to imply a kind of support. It seemed to offer a dependable framework to keep him from going too far in one direction or the other (intently), and was used as a cushion against the other uncertainties in your lives. The panic he feels in some particular kind of relaxation episodes does indeed involve the psychological feelings that were buried within that releasing tension.