“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

(Jane also tried walking with the table with Frank’s help, as she had with me the day before, but once again couldn’t quite get up on her feet. She did better, though. She also tried the library today, as Seth had suggested, but with “nil” results, but didn’t try the energy-healing exercise yet. She plans to keep at both. She did have an unclear image while trying for the library, and discovered it was a bit scary. Yet while trying the library she felt “relaxed and panicky at the same time.”

Now: within a fairly regular (pause) framework of habits and range of activity, you have both actually chosen a course that is in many ways uncertain, irregular, unpredictable.

You are free-lancers, so that you do not deal with a regular, specified financial state, of course. To that degree your livelihood depends upon many elements. You are never certain of your income’s exact amount per month, say, as you would be if you had salaries. The very nature of the work that you are involved in implies uncertainty—and this aside from psychic activity. That is, writing and painting themselves embark you upon uncertain routes. Again, they are not products with known specifications and measurements. The psychic work brings in a further extension, both of a do-it-yourself element, and the creative uncertainty.

(Pause.) You value rather “set” habits that serve as more or less steady platforms for the pursuit of the uncertain nature of both your arts and psychic activity.

The official world has its answers, methods, philosophy, standards, all set. The civilization is built around them. You are looking for better ways to live your lives, seeking a larger framework of existence. This is not some dry academic undertaking, but a matter of intense personal activities on both of your parts.

(Long pause.) Now, regardless of many objections to the contrary, Ruburt’s condition still has served your own ends as well as his—and into the present. To an extent they have served as their own stabilizers, giving you both excuses and protections from events of perhaps an intrusive fashion, such as the interviews or guests, or even strangers at the door. (Long pause.)In a fashion they produced their own kind of certainty. They also reflected—to some degree, now—your own perhaps more subsidiary beliefs that it was not safe to relax, or that spontaneity might lead to further uncertainties. It is not necessary that you learn to gush endlessly about your love for Ruburt, but it is important that you do express it, and you have indeed been better in that area. Your joint acknowledgement of your love, however, vastly increases the feelings of safety in your lives, and the love-making involving touch is very reminiscent of the childhood state involving freedom, when children rejoice in touching themselves and other objects and so forth.