“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

(Eventually, and very reluctantly, since I considered it a sign of a major failure, I ended up carrying her physically from the john to her chair—rather awkwardly but not with as much trouble as I’d anticipated, yet also feeling a bit of a strain in my lower back. I am still aware of a muscular sensation there, although I slept well. Jane was much relieved that I could move her, and surprised, but I had my doubts about being able to do that on a longer-term basis: I dared not endanger my own physical condition lest I be unable to take care of her otherwise, regardless of how poorly or with what ill grace I might do that.

There is a relaxation going on, and a loosening between the hips and the legs, that causes other large muscles to hold back to maintain balance temporarily, to move more slowly to compensate for the unaccustomed looseness of other portions. That loosening also frightens Ruburt because of the resulting disorientation—but the disorientation represents a breaking-down of old patterns.