“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

(We haven’t held a session since last Tuesday evening. We’ve been very tired, even exhausted; I’ve been sleeping in the afternoons with Jane. She’s been doing very well with the new chair in the bathroom, and is now going to the john three times a day. [When I remarked that I’d like to see her up her trips to four times a day, she at once became defensive, so I cooled it.] I followed her advice and sprayed the linoleum-covered chair seat with furniture polish to make it more slippery, so that she can more easily slide sideways from the chair onto the couch or john. “A great idea,” I told Frank Longwell yesterday noon.

(This afternoon, when I returned from running errands—paying state and federal taxes, etc.—Jane told me that she was having all kinds of “weird things” happening in her back and legs, as though various portions of her anatomy were loosening at uneven rates. Her balance and double vision were affected too. We slept together during a nap. I woke up with my stomach bothering me, and Jane, half crying, with a continuing of the strange, intensified feelings of uncontrolled motion/extra-slow motion combined and manifested in her back and legs. She worried about not being able to get from the bed to the chair to the john, but did well nevertheless.

(Now I explained to Jane what I considered to be “a gorgeous little illustration” of how unconscious hassles can go on in the psyche quite unsuspected by the conscious mind as the cause for physical difficulties: As stated, when I woke up this afternoon my stomach hurt. It’s been bothering me for the last few days, for no apparent reason; looking back, probably since Jack Joyce visited a few days ago about our making estimated tax payments to NY State. Interestingly enough, though, I made no such conscious connection until I began writing these notes. Then it came to consciousness: of course. Today I paid estimated federal and NYS taxes, and had planned to do so since seeing Jack. At once I checked with the pendulum—and got a great big yes —that was why my stomach had been acting up. My old bugaboo had returned, but very craftily so that I hadn’t been aware of it. I’d thought I’d managed to dismiss concerns about taxes, and actually have succeeded in doing so to a large degree—witness my physical well-being when paying taxes last April 15, for example. “Yet,” I said to Jane, “it shows how conflicts can keep going underground if you don’t watch it, and can be very damaging in the long run....”