“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

No conscious decisions were ever really clearly made, because Ruburt felt that ideally (underlined), if he were giving himself true freedom and being true to all his abilities, he would and should be performing in such a manner. He would naturally want to be at least on the most intelligent of television shows, for example, or speak to those groups for which he had some respect.

Ruburt did well today, and made the proper decisions finally, being much more aware of his own psychological mobility as his moods and his body statements changed. The idea of the letter was excellent, and represented your contribution (to Prentice-Hall). Your own difficulty with notes on our books or whatever comes mainly when you forget your own self-directedness and sense of enjoyment, and replace those with a sense of responsibility.

(10:13.) Your joint decision to tackle the entire situation shook the status quo, of course. It does also represent the highest therapeutic value, however, as such issues are brought out into the open. Ruburt is learning to understand that it is safe to be himself; he must learn to rediscover the sources of his own pleasure, for these provide the most dependable indications by which actions and decisions can be taken.

(I do think that it will all serve a valuable purpose, however, if we clear up the one major stumbling block over publicity—whether to do or not to do it. If we have solved that dilemma, well and good. Earlier I asked Jane if she was willing to stick by her decision to forgo public life, as stated in the letter she wrote Prentice today, and she said yes. I certainly am, let the chips fall where they may. I for one have no real idea of how Prentice-Hall may react, although Jane told me today that she’s picked up that Prentice-Hall plans to be much more aggressive on questions concerning publicity. I don’t think there will be any hassle, for surely the people at Prentice-Hall know enough about Jane’s abilities and sales and productive talents to know a good thing when they have one, whether or not publicity is involved.

(A note: Jane did tell me Saturday that she’s noticed an improvement in her hands and arms, and also in her ability to get onto the bed from her chair, since we made the decision to not do publicity.)