“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

DELETED SESSION

(This is the first session Jane has held since giving the deleted one for last January 7. Once again, she was very uncomfortable as she sat in her chair across the coffee table from me. Earlier today—as she reaffirmed now—she’d said more than once that she wanted to “get back to the sessions, no matter what,” or how she felt. Her bodily condition presented rather large contrasts: Her upper body was very relaxed, her eyes bleary. Her arms were longer, as they had been for some time now. Her backside was sore, as well as her hips and inner thighs at the groin; she couldn’t move forward easily. At the same time her upper legs above the knees were “soft and mushy,” while below the knees the muscles were hard and tight. Yet her feet were in good shape. These are the highlights of her condition. This morning she’d slept for an hour before lunch.

(This week especially has also been one of emotional turmoil for us, and for many others, on the national scene: the inauguration of President Reagan; the freeing of the American hostages by Iran, and their return to this country in stages. Steve and Tracy Blumenthal have also lent us a complete videotaping set, and we’ve experimented a little bit with filming Jane reading poetry. The Gallaghers have also been featured. We’re waiting for an extension cord from Steve for the TV camera so we can try to record sessions. I’ve wanted to try to film Jane reading poetry in the meantime, but each time I think of asking her —usually at night—I can see that she’s so uncomfortable that I let it go.

(Jane has had some interesting nighttime experiences in connection with the hostages, and has written the brief note attached to the session. She hasn’t been able to really explain them yet; perhaps Seth will comment. My own guess is that she’s touched upon some probable events.

(Jane said she felt Seth around by 9:20, but that she thought the session would be a short one. I told her I was primarily interested in but two things, both personal: her reactions to Mass Events and God of Jane in connection with her symptoms, and what was going on in her backside and hips. She hasn’t “walked” for weeks now—since last year—and the hip problems especially have persisted now for a number of months. I wanted to hear from Seth something about why her body was taking so long to respond in those areas.

(The night before this session was held Jane suggested that each day we read over a session, or talk or review some notes, as a way to give ourselves a “pep talk” and to lead us into the day. So the day of the session, after breakfast this morning, we reread the deleted session for January 7, 1981, which is a very good one. And this morning—Tuesday—I read last night’s session to Jane from my notes, since I didn’t have it typed yet.)

The information in Mass Events and in our sessions helped him use impulses to a far better degree than he had before, and helped him keep some balance, let him advance in understanding despite the period of difficulty. Still at various times and throughout the period, he used what he thought of as that additional protection: the symptoms kept him inside, where it seemed he could indeed express himself with the least duress. At the same time he was learning that expression denied at one level means expression denied to some extent at all levels (louder)—so that of course his creative work also suffered to some degree.

End of session.

The immobility protected him, so he thought, from encountering any such outside conflicts, and insured his continuing creativity by cutting down other interests and distractions, and by organizing his time in a most economical fashion—or so it seemed. That is a simplified answer. The nuances, which are important, appear in many groups of sessions, given in the past, and also include his reaction to attitudes of your own, which to some extent helped form and solidify his own ideas in those regards.

End of session.

(10:42 PM. Jane closed her eyes as Seth, and when she opened them that personality was gone. The session had hardly been a short one; I told her it was excellent.

(Jane had been restless during the session, but felt pretty good now. I thought the session contained many good things. It’s Wednesday as I finish typing it. I typed half of it Tuesday night; but Tuesday morning, in keeping with our idea to ground ourselves in new ideas each day, I read the full session to her from my notes.

(As I finished it this evening, however, I can see now that the session is even a better one that I’d thought. Actually, it contains the key to Jane’s recovery, and her progress continues. I massaged her thighs after supper. This afternoon, when I told her it was okay to relax, “even to walk,” she said “something melted” inside her, and she became more relaxed. In fact, she slept for over an hour this morning. She planned to try for a session this evening, she said, as I went back to my typing.

(I might add that Seth’s capsule commentary on the reasons for her symptoms is just what I wanted, and that we ought to keep copies of it available for easy reference. The thought came to me after supper that Jane’s doing the ESP classes probably contributed to the symptoms over the years, since the class situation was one in which she advanced her unconventional ideas to the public. I haven’t had a chance to discuss this with her, but it seems possible that her disseminating her ideas to a large number of people, in person each week, could have struck her deep-seated need for protection.... If Jane reads this material before holding a session tonight, perhaps Seth can comment.)