“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

(Finally she called me for the session at 9:40 PM. Again she struggled to get comfortable, just as she’d done for last Wednesday night’s session. Walter is a nice young man. I went back to working on taxes while Jane talked to him, and at the same time found myself wondering whether his unexpected visit might symbolize one of the very facets of Jane’s dilemma about privacy versus the public life—at least as I understand it: Her vulnerability and availability to anyone who chooses to come here. We can’t get away. Others must know this, by whatever means, and may take advantage of her immobility. Walter, for example, told us that when he woke up this morning he decided to go see Jane Roberts—so he just came. [This was his second visit, the first being a couple of years ago.]

Now: Ruburt for a while should write his own impressions of encounters such as this evening’s, or such as the visit of the two girls (from Columbus, Ohio a few days ago).

Through writing such notes, and exploring his feelings, his own attitudes will come more clearly to mind. In any case he should begin again writing about his feelings. He is in a way a different kind of psychologist, examining the nature of psychological reality from different viewpoints. He did not simply accept “mediumship” at its face value, so to speak. (Long pause.) Most people, generally speaking, have one more or less familiar notion of a self that they try to actualize within physical reality. (Pause.) They do not have visions or experience, again generally speaking, with any characteristics that cannot be actualized more or less within the framework of established experience.

They try to actualize that self within the known world. Ruburt uses abilities that do not fit that known world’s categories—abilities that by their nature straddle many dimensions of activity, none of them normally conventional, normally established, none of them easily defined. As a physical person Ruburt can only actualize himself through the properties of his creaturehood, yet he is aware of those other tantalizing activities.

He encounters the invisible organization of my books, say, the effect of those books upon others. He recognizes the vast complexity that lies behind our relationship, and therefore is ever aware of psychological issues encountered by few other people, relatively speaking. His relationship with me, and mine with him, is bound to be interpreted in multitudinous ways by our readership, the public and so forth. To some extent (pause), there can be a feeling of inferiority on his part (pause), one that he does of course not deserve. He focuses in the world, and I do not.

(So here again, we have a reference to Jane’s possible feelings about Seth and what he does, regardless of whether his labors may be eventually published as “a Seth book.”

The trouble is that he tries to live up to an idealized image. That image in a way is a potpourri, picked up from his readers, even other books, the culture in general. He thinks that ideally he should want to be a public person, to give and enjoy giving interviews to the press or television, that he should (underlined) carry our message out into the world, have sessions on television so that people can see how I operate (with amused emphasis). If he were not frightened, it seems to him that is what he would and should do.

(Pause at 10:35.) He also feels he should (underlined) be able to display at least enough healing ability to help those in dire straits (pause), and he expects himself to display such a deep understanding and compassion for the world and its people that any divergence from such an attitude seems to make him appear more inferior by contrast. In that regard, tell him that my own fine tempered consideration of men’s foibles is somewhat easier to come by, since I do not deal with them daily. He feels pressured, therefore, to become a public person, forgetting his own background and temperament.

He thinks that that background and temperament should no longer apply. That is, if once he disliked crowds, a new purpose and understanding should let him rise above such nonsense—but there has always been a kind of singularity there (long pause)—a characteristic need to go his own way. This does not mean that he has no need for expression. Small groups are one thing, large ones something else. The private context was the home, when you had classes. He likes encounters with other people, naturally, but he does not like crowds nor speaking to a kind of mass mind, directly encountered.

Ruburt should do some small amount of writing each day—for his own pleasure and expression. It is disconnected from ideas of publishing, though later it may be published. (Pause.) The responsibility for each person’s life lies with that person. That (underlined) is one of our main messages. The books offer their own continuing educational process for people to follow if they choose, and the process of self-discovery is one of the most valuable aspects of such growth. So Ruburt is not to be taken in by people who come here or write, expecting him to solve their problems in the flesh, or expecting me to do it. Nor is he obligated to answer mail.