“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

—there are hidden aspects involved with creativity, of course—stages of development that do not show.

Ruburt had a reason for not going on tour, for example—one that was certainly acceptable enough in a world of conventional understanding. He was saved, so it seemed, from endless explanations; so with a kind of psychological economy that worked far too well for a time the symptoms served to keep him writing at his desk, to regulate the flow of psychic activity, making sure of its direction, and to provide a suitable social reason to refrain from activities that might distract him—from tours or shows, and also even from any onslaught of psychic activity that might follow any unseeming (underlined) spontaneous behavior.

He did not start out being a public speaker, for example. He likes the distance between himself and the public that books provide (emphatically). He is excellent at communicating ideas in writing or vocally, gifted in understanding people—so those abilities do come to his aid in public speaking engagements.

(Long pause.) In such engagements, however, for him at least, that necessary private threshold is crossed, endangered. The inner psychological distance must become surfacely portrayed, instantly translated to the audience, so that for him there is the same kind of reaction that he might have in talking to others overly much about a book of his own in progress—as if he might talk out the book, and therefore not need to write it, while at the same time losing much of the inner development that might otherwise give the book its own deeper meanings.

Added to that you have the issue mentioned earlier, of my relationship with him and vice versa, and his idea of an idealized self. Now it is that idealized self he is seeing in his mind that should find it so easy and natural to triumph in the public arena, solve people’s problems, always be compassionate and understanding, and certainly not critical of mankind’s foibles.

(10:55.) Some of the members of your readership added to the pressure, of course (long pause). Behind all that you have earlier aspects of Ruburt’s life, involving habits of secrecy developed in childhood, the need for protection and so forth, that simply served to help build the framework. The young woman (Jane) found herself extremely uncomfortable to find your family members living together in one house—astounded by the thought of the family together in a trailer, frightened of the camp get-togethers. She could be expected to have some difficulties when presented with the thought that she should speak to gatherings of perhaps a thousand people or more, and that this was indeed her responsibility, all other feelings to the contrary.

(I made quick notes about my insight just now. and transcribe them below without much elaboration. I would say they represent simplistic thinking to some degree—but that, again, I’ve hit on something here that hasn’t been expressed in just this way before. I feel the same mechanisms for understanding operated here as did when I had the insight of February 3—see the deleted session for February 4 [the first in this new series], wherein I wrote that Jane “does the Seth books just to please me.” I think that insight is connected to the following: