“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

(“I very vaguely feel him around,” Jane said at 9:30, after we’d been sitting for the session since 9:10. I’d been busy with these notes while waiting. Earlier, she’d finished a small acrylic still life of flowers and fruit.)

Most people operate at one largely exclusive state of consciousness. Even most creative work is done at the recognized threshold of the normal waking consciousness. Ruburt was presented with—or presented himself with—a situation in which large portions of his creative life appeared in books that were written in another state of consciousness entirely. Little wonder, then, that he felt he must alert all natural and normal controls.

It is no coincidence that you have been relatively free of that concept in its traditional religious connotation. You worked that out in your Nebene existence to a large extent, and because of your own preparations for a life in which you are now involved.

In personal terms, he feared that his father abandoned him for that reason, that his mother disliked him for that reason, for each person will interpret the belief in his or her own life according to circumstances.

He thought that he was such a bad person that he drove his parents apart, perhaps caused his mother’s illness, perhaps his grandmother’s death—for which his mother did indeed several times blame him—and that the classical idea of the Sinful Self was individually interpreted in that manner in Ruburt’s personal early life.

His mother told him he ruined everyone he touched. Those experiences were relatively unfortunate enough, but they were a part of the early life of someone who later finds themselves embarked upon in the study of the very nature of the self, so that they led him to believe that strong cautionary methods must be used. Period.