“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

(For the past few days I’ve done little “creative” work, beyond working on my watercolor portrait of Mrs. Johnson, the subject of my dream of last November, for an hour or two in the mornings; then in the afternoons I’ve typed these sessions and written the required notes for the record. I’ve done a lot of yard work—it seems to be a very therapeutic activity at this time—and worked on filing. I feel considerably better, to my great relief, although the stomach isn’t cleared yet as much as I would like. The discomfort in the groin/testicle area is much less, at times absent altogether, and I believe that my steady rereading of Seth’s recent private material for me has helped a great deal here. I’ve also taken to using mental imagery in this field, and will continue to do so for some time; I think there’s no reason why that can’t be effective also. It’s something I’ve largely neglected in past periods of discomfort. I haven’t gone back to the pendulum yet. I read Jane’s prayer for her, and Seth’s New Year resolutions for me. The more I study those, the more I realize how good they are.

As he became known, they served to keep the world away for both of you. They served to show why you worked at home, or did not sell your work at galleries: you had to take care of Ruburt. They saved you both from making endless decisions as to whom you would see, or whether you would go on tours. They pared life down to its necessities. They were Ruburt’s version of health foods, abstinence, and so forth, in the Nearing’s way, and to all of this both of you to some extent acquiesced.

Again, to some extent now (underlined), both of you wanted a framework that would allow you what you thought of as freedom to work. Ruburt is learning that even he went too far, but I do want you still to think of the symptoms as a well-meaning but distorted structure that can dissolve—and can dissolve overnight when Ruburt understands it is no longer needed or wanted. It is a method that he tried, but it did not work because it defeated its own purposes.