“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

Before you moved here you imagined, both of you, what oddities you would be in the neighborhood, and exaggerated your differences from others. Ruburt did not mind spending the money for the porches. Since he would be “increasing the value of the plant”—the working establishment. He would write on the back one (humorously) to show the porch was not after all for pleasure.

This session you read (the 367th) applied mostly to Ruburt, yet you also have what I will call an overly conscientious self in battle with the spontaneous self (a fact I’m well aware of, and had discussed with Jane before tonight’s session). You have actually grown somewhat more spontaneous. Why not—since Ruburt was nicely expressing the overly conscientious selves of both of you?

Now: you had of course other problems that he was not experienced enough to see, and at the time the sessions began you were both at a low point. The release of psychic energy involved, regardless of me, was literally a new birth, bringing forth an impetus for change and creative activity. In an important sense, Ruburt’s abilities as a writer found their forte. He had found his direction —though that direction did not follow his beliefs. He was naturally meant to go in areas that would confound his earlier upbringing.

Both of you realized from young ages that you were different from others, relatively speaking, and you gloried in the differences. When you came together you wanted to be alone together. You wanted to be alone and to work at your pursuits.

Your perfectionist tendencies tell you not to go out into the world until Ruburt can walk normally and proudly. Your perfectionist tendencies—I refer to both of you—tell you that it is a crime for either of you to have a problem, whether or not the rest of the world is filled with chaos.

Ruburt’s condition, in a way, stops you from hurting others. If you close the door in the world’s face, it is because Ruburt cannot walk properly. The overly conscientious self on both of your parts to a strong degree becomes a composite personality. Its beliefs are invisible because you accept them unthinkingly. The next few old sessions should be read. You have both largely, except in your work, now, cut spontaneity from your lives; your habits are so set.