“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

Now: I have given some—not all—of this material before, but now you can put the understanding to better advantage. Ruburt’s “overly conscientious self” was indeed built up in response to his belief that he was, to begin with, overly enthusiastic, overly impulsive, overly spontaneous. He was naturally expressive and open with people. He was creatively gifted—but an overly impulsive child does not care for an invalid mother, conscientiously, for 21 years.

Now. If you did not express your sexuality through sexual experience, as prescribed, you were in for trouble. So went the tale. You found yourselves married. Ruburt as a woman, with those beliefs in the background, determined not to betray the writer, Jane, or the artist, Robert—thru becoming pregnant, or making too many sexual demands. Ruburt, incidentally, had a natural abortion because the message was already in the body, and all of his worries and concerns were unnecessary.

There are bodies, in those terms, who do not want to have physical offspring. They are not faulty. They fit in with nature’s plans, and with the psychological plans of the personalities involved. You were rather repressed at that period, frightened about your own work, and sometimes you would ignore Ruburt’s occasional sexual advances when you happened to be in your studio. He felt he was too spontaneous, again, too impulsive—but then in that belief system he worried if his sexual needs could not be properly squashed, supposing someone else aroused them, and he “fell in love” with someone else as quickly as he had fallen in love with you. Or worse—supposing your repressed sexuality was repressed because of your joint work, and supposing you fell in love with someone else, and became sexually aroused for another?

The comics acquainted you with what I will call a kind of surface art, and also in a way acquainted you with caricatures of social reality. Also involved however were folk dreams, as for example with Captain Marvel. While you happily worked and caroused quite innocently, you also began half unconsciously to further question the nature, not necessarily of society, but of the individual lives you met within it. The deep drives of your personality began to make their way known.