“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

(We hoped Seth would consider some of the questions this evening. In past days Jane’s rhythmic alterations between soreness and comfort in various part of her body continued, almost as though on a schedule.)

Let us for the moment forget where or how each of you chose certain attitudes. If you did not have some trust in yourselves, some appreciation of your own characteristics, you would not have allowed yourselves to develop and use your abilities at all—or, for that matter, you would not have been able to form a vital long-term relationship with another person.

You felt that you must to some extent at least protect yourselves against your neighbors—who as both of you said often “Would take up all of your time without a qualm”—neighbors or friends who you felt would not understand your goals, however good their intent. You must then jointly protect your time.

I am describing attitudes. Years ago, when it looked—generally speaking, now: I am simplifying—as if you might be swallowed by Artistic, you rebelled and became ill. You made certain readjustments, the sessions began, time went on. You were not selling paintings to any considerable degree. Ruburt knew he would not take a full-time job either. You may sometimes forget now how vehement your joint ideas were in those years, against the ordinary individual’s prospect of working eight hours a day, year after year, in the same place, doing the same thing. So Ruburt added the necessity of money to his creative goals, in a strong fashion.

When, as time progressed, the need for constant decisions to speak here and there, to see thus and so, to do housework or write, or whatever, Ruburt simply began to cut down on the body’s availability to action, and he felt that that would take care of that.

You were each for some time relieved. These are patterns of attitudes of long standing, and at different times, as Ruburt improved, and new decisions came to mind, he backtracked, and you largely went along. With the continuation of the physical restraints other problems grew, and Ruburt would become frightened that his body could not indeed heal itself, and you feared the same. The past “failures” seemed indisputable evidence.

I would like the hot towels applied. End of session, and a fond good evening.