“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

Though Ruburt was a good-looking young woman, with much vitality, he had no children, and indeed had been determined not to, for writing was the overwhelming interest in his life. He also needed love, however. Though you were in your thirties, you had not married, and your sex life was rather controlled. You both had at that point decided not to concentrate upon family life. You had furthermore decided, and separately, before you met, to avoid conventional long-term relationships in the world of business. Neither of you wanted conventional jobs, regardless now of any prestige or security they might bring. In that regard you saw yourselves as like spirits. You believed in the importance of developing your own abilities, because those abilities so naturally manifested themselves as strong elements of your personalities.

You both felt that the development of those abilities must be protected, lest the need for financial security lead you into full-time work on a long-term basis. You felt that you must to some extent allow your love for each other to nourish those abilities, and yet not jeopardize them lest it lead you into parenthood.

You felt that you must to some extent at least protect yourselves against your neighbors—who as both of you said often “Would take up all of your time without a qualm”—neighbors or friends who you felt would not understand your goals, however good their intent. You must then jointly protect your time.

Your other attitudes, mentioned earlier, continued, and the more the world seemed to knock at your door, however gently, and the more the mail came, the more convinced you both became that your solitude must be protected. The attitudes mentioned belong to some extent to each of you. That is why, for example, you went along as long as you have with Ruburt’s condition. Neither of you liked it. To that extent, Ruburt does speak for both of you (as Jane said this noon), and in your own way both of you rewarded him for creative material, and withheld approval for any tendencies that ran counter to those mentioned attitudes.

The same sort of situation operates in millions of families, and the rewards that you gave each other for your creative endeavors were excellent, and worked beautifully. They still do. There is nothing wrong with the other attitudes. You did, however, both for years believe most firmly that your creative endeavors were dependent upon the need for protection from others, the world, from time, and even from any of your own characteristics that did not seem to fit into that overall pattern.

All of this meant he was left with body beliefs, so that he believed his body could not respond normally. Again, the evidence gave seeming confirmation, so that his confidence in his body was lessened. You both used his condition as an excuse for not doing certain things because you believed an excuse was necessary.