“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

(For the last several days Jane’s arms, shoulders, hands, rib cage, and related parts have bothered her tremendously—more so than ever. Presumably, muscles and ligaments are still stretching, but the process has been very painful for her, making many movements she used to enact very difficult. Her walking has been impaired also by the extreme sensitivity of her upper body. Her stress relieved itself to some degree today as the hours passed, although she was still quite uncomfortable, still unable to walk as much as she had been doing recently. I asked that Seth comment on all of these developments, and why they were so painful for Jane.

(Shortly before the session began, Jane made a remark about her hands feeling better after her nap. For whatever reason, this seemed to trigger an insight on my part. I found it quite difficult to describe to Jane, for I always felt unspoken, unverbalized connotations in the background that, I thought, represented new ideas for both of us. My words made the insight sound more prosaic than it really was, I’m afraid. I tried writing it down so that I could read it to Jane: “Why did the personality adopt a course of action—being out of condition, say—that eventually came to assume such proportions in life that the focus upon it equaled, or even surpassed, the hours spent in the creative actions of writing that the personality said it wanted to do each day above everything else?”

(The above isn’t an accurate definition of what the insight was about, and I do think it was a valid one; it may be as good as I could get it in discrete words, I told Jane after I’d read it to her. I was after an understanding on various levels of the fact that Jane had created something that certainly assumed equal billing with her other creative work—that the personality may have been quite aware that this would happen, and was willing in some sort of terms for the situation to exist for a number of years.

(Jane only said that the insight, if accurate at all, was depressing, after I’d read it to her.)

Now, to some extent, you and Ruburt felt enough the same way to make the analogy feasible, only Ruburt was the one who constructed the edifice that would protect his own abilities, first of all, and yours as well. Beliefs are the attendants—not strangers at all. With such an edifice, Ruburt can only use his abilities under certain conditions, and he imagines all kinds of impulses, situations, or whatever, that might steal them away, or steal away the time necessary to express them. Just like our millionaire, who everywhere imagines in the most innocent face the gluttonous look of the thief-to-be.

The millionaire checks all of the locks, perhaps, or has the bank president show him the latest security measures that are being taken—and to some degree, now, Ruburt, and you to a lesser degree, have checked Ruburt’s security system. Was it secure enough to keep you from accepting invitations, to allow you to avoid distractions, or emotional complications that might arise from any considerable contact with others in, say, “professional terms?” Ruburt built the edifice, but you looked on, for though you disliked the building blocks, say, the symptoms—you thought until very lately that it did serve its purpose very well.

Unfortunately, the system itself began to impede the very abilities it was meant to protect. Such abilities must have freedom, and insist upon it, and so the security system itself always felt in jeopardy. The body kept insisting that it was being put upon most severely. Our last session should also be read in context with this one.

(10:18.) Now give us a moment.... As given in the last session, the cost of running the security system was finally becoming too great, and at different times strong efforts were made to dispense with it. The old beliefs were still there, however, and between the two of you, at the first hint of “danger” Ruburt hastily put the system back together again.

Your household situation was set up with Ruburt’s immobility, relatively speaking, largely uncontested. As it became harder for him to navigate, it became “easier” for him to stay at home. Now you are contesting the issue, and (in) doing so, some patterns should become apparent. It takes your time, and his now, to encourage his walking, and if this is in “working hours,” both of your old beliefs are directly challenged.

(10:35.) Give us a moment.... Your joint determination is very strong, and is working for you. Definitely encourage his walking as you have planned to together. The disorientation leading to lesser walking for a while was simply the body’s way of protecting itself during periods of initial imbalances. Enough of that is over, however, and Ruburt is determined enough, now, so that whatever you decide upon can be followed through, though the distances might vary. You will see an overall improvement, however.

The whole area of work, time, inspiration and protection should be explored, and kept in the open, and Ruburt should write some kind of statement that expresses his understanding of the matter thus far, and states his questions. Try to arrange it so that the walking periods still give each of you, say, a certain amount of time between for your creative pursuits. I will have more at our next session. The important thing to remember is that the edifice was created, and can be torn down. Again—Ruburt’s body can perform better. End of session, and a fond good evening.