“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

By yesterday several new and significant changes appeared. Two or three times Ruburt found himself getting up, not only easier but easily to a considerably higher position. Finally he felt the impulse to walk without the table, used the plunger as an aid, and did not need to put his weight upon it. That meant that at that point newly activated portions of muscles and joints were working more or less in unison. He had to bend over, but the elasticized back was simply holding itself in abeyance. The muscles in the high portions of the legs, in the back, are the ones that need to be strengthened to unite the body in the flexibility that various portions of it are achieving.

Ruburt felt like seeing company—a good sign. You encouraged him in that respect, but not too actively. You went along, however. When Ruburt could not reach O’Neill’s, and pleased by his reactions during the day, you acted on impulse—a good sign, and suggested you both go for a ride. Up to here, all is well.

He made a half-hearted attempt to get out of it. You then made a remark, voicing his own fears as well as your own, saying that you would not let him get away with it, meaning you would not let him get away with not going out as a pattern. So you were both in the middle of a crisis. What happened physically was this. Ruburt’s body had extended itself on several occasions that day, stretching and using new postures, giving him the impulses toward further activity, exercising itself through that small-enough but important walk. It then relaxed.

(10:02.) Ruburt went out to his room. The phone rang. Ruburt was given what he wanted—the psychological stimulation of a friend, who was all ready to visit you because Ruburt’s message had gotten through. The psychological activity would have allowed the body to continue its process. The impulse had been a good one, to have company. Even then Ruburt was tempted to have Wade come, but his own disapproval, and yours, made it obvious that to do so would certainly be a copout. His body was not ready.

Ruburt’s body earlier signaled its desire to move, its readiness. He obeyed the impulse, which was excellent. The other bodily messages were as valid, and there was no need to take it for granted, as both of you did, that some element in Ruburt’s personality was rebelliously and purposefully sabotaging you at that time.

When Ruburt does not go out, however, it is never a simple issue of the body’s condition at any given time, but a moral dilemma in which, basically you see, you are misinterpreting events. Ruburt felt like having company. Your own improved mental habits of the week, your pendulum work and his own improvements, released energy that under those conditions sought release—and his impulse showed him in what direction.

On another occasion, he might have wanted to go out, to take a drive; and the impulse will also be the result of the body’s knowledge that the time is right. He was relieved during your bad weather because the artificial crisis was lessened. You have made gains, and important ones. Ruburt’s body messages should be heeded. He heeds them if they follow your ideas of improvements. If not, you both take it for granted that the body is not in the middle of a process, but that some immediate challenge exists.

Self-disapproval always takes resistance for granted, and sees it at every turn, therefore of course leading to battles of one kind-or another. I do not blame you for wishing that Ruburt’s table were not necessary, but he is showing signs that he will be able to dispense with it. I do not blame you for wishing he did not need a stool at the sink, but that area has no conflict now, and Thursday he had an impulse to do the dishes without it. Yet, aids in the garage also were considered copouts.