“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

You find yourselves landowners somewhat. You see others shoveling their walks themselves. You disapprove of yourself for not doing so. You feel you could not do so—that you are not physically that vigorous (as I told Jane today). This is symbolic of course of your attitudes. For you feel that the life-styles are completely different, and polarized.

You have fallen for the same conventionalized beliefs that they have, only you chose the subjective side. They were so afraid of subjective thought that they ran willy-nilly in the other direction, and they envy your choice—again, to some degree. In summer, you think you should do the lawn. You feel that conflicts with your subjective interests, and that the two are not compatible. You see Joe frantically mow his lawn. You are contemptuous—somewhat—and envious at the same time. The same applies to the snow, so you disapprove of yourself whether you have the grass or the snow taken care of—or whether you try to do it yourself.

Give us a moment.... Some of your inner feelings are difficult for me to express, because they are in so many layers that I am not sure of their relative importance. To some extent, again then, the sale of a book, a new sale, is somehow connected in your mind with disapproval of yourself, Joseph, in that Ruburt seems able to express what I think you interpret as competitiveness, that you feel you are not expressing—and you add that to your arsenal of disapproval. (Very good.)

All Ruburt wants is normal motion. You saw the response in his leg this evening. The important neck and jaw areas are definitely releasing, and the eyes will swiftly begin to resume their normal activity—if you continue as you are. Your own physical vigor is there, and can express itself, comparatively speaking —comparatively speaking—with far greater ease once you rid yourself of those polarized concepts and the disapproval that goes with them.