“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

When he danced, he often felt that he was dancing out the emotions of others. When our sessions began I spoke to you in an intellectual rather than emotional manner. In the beginning the two of you experimented more or less together, with your psy-time and so forth. You did not allow yourself to be moved by people to the extent that Ruburt sometimes did.

He grew afraid of drinking, lest his inhibitions be dropped, and he began getting impressions about other people, and telling them. Several affairs frightened you both: the woman in labor, for example, and the affair in which Ruburt banged upon the table. You both felt that considerable caution had to be used. Ruburt drank considerably in class—yet always with one eye watching the other. He had to show that he had psychic abilities, but that he was in control of them. He had to prove that he was a reasonable person. He felt that you would disapprove of many class events, in those classes you did not attend—that you would think he went too far.

Ruburt felt he had to explain to the world, and he began to cut off experiences that he did not intellectually find decisive answers for. This does apply to the predictions and to his attitudes toward the mail—which are highly ambiguous.

Creative work must transcend time, and when he is writing well, time is forgotten. His poem last night took a good full 20 minutes (with amused irony). That cannot be compared in any way with the amount of work done by someone in a normal eight-hour day. Someone could work at a poem for eight hours, and have nothing. He wrote the poem because he felt like it—scandalous behavior—and also because he had expressed his feelings and written them down.