“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

He grew afraid of drinking, lest his inhibitions be dropped, and he began getting impressions about other people, and telling them. Several affairs frightened you both: the woman in labor, for example, and the affair in which Ruburt banged upon the table. You both felt that considerable caution had to be used. Ruburt drank considerably in class—yet always with one eye watching the other. He had to show that he had psychic abilities, but that he was in control of them. He had to prove that he was a reasonable person. He felt that you would disapprove of many class events, in those classes you did not attend—that you would think he went too far.

Ruburt has emphasized the intellect’s critical qualities, so that they serve as an impetus to lead him to this opening that he knows exists, though he only senses it so far, and has experienced it but briefly. It would carry him where intuitively he knows he can go.

The intellect then discovers that its own abilities were greatly limited before, because of the small scope within which its questions were asked. Ruburt is now coming to that kind of realization, and that kind of development—which is of course the only possible answer. Some intellects weary quicker than others, or quickly use up, say, a fairly limited scope, but Ruburt’s has been restless and stubborn.

I am not making judgments now, but showing reactions—so the two of you hid the sessions from the beginning, for example. You tried to fit the sessions into the scientific context, as you thought was right, with the testing and so forth. None of that spoke of any great emotional exhibitionism, yet both of you feared it. Ruburt has pared down his abilities (as I mentioned before the session). He has pared them down to those he could reasonably explain intellectually.

This means of course that his intellect is far more flexible than most—yet the intellect as you understand it has been conditioned to accept only a small portion of your intuitional reality. You concurred in a good bit of this, often through unspoken attitudes, and through invisible example, but you got your backs up against the world, with chips upon your shoulders.

There are various reasons for the problems after a nap, but usually various feelings that he has not resolved during the day—often of guilt—come to the surface when he awakens.

He feels guilty, for one thing, that you prepare supper, but if he has not worked as much as he thinks he should have by then, that guilt is added. He feels it is the end of the normal working day for others, and therefore he should have put in so much time.

(“What do you think of that reading Jane received in the mail today?” I referred to a reading by the medium, Elwood Babbit, given for someone who had written Jane several months ago; the individual subsequently saw Babbitt, and sent Jane a copy of the long, rambling, very generalized material that could have applied to many people. We noted wryly that the correspondent made no mention of what EB had charged for the reading. Jane was scandalized and embarrassed by the reading. I was sorrowful and appalled. She repeated that there must be something wrong with her attitude toward affairs of that kind, but I said I didn’t think so.