“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

You judge the world harshly also. You do not thoroughly appreciate emotionally your part in the production of our material, or realize that its direction and so forth must be, and is, colored by your own unique characteristics as well as Ruburt’s—and that at certain levels, the Seth material, as it exists, is a product of your lives together. Not as easily understood a product, perhaps, as a series of excellent paintings, not as easily categorized—and yet you are helping to paint a giant-sized picture of the psyche as it translates inner reality into the living fabric of the world.

Last week Ruburt did fairly well. He actually concentrated upon Seven, typed it creatively, walked several times a day, began to help with meals and with the house, and comparatively speaking you both had a fairly good week. Then, once again, you both began to concentrate upon the problem. Ruburt’s legs activated themselves in rather strenuous fashion in bed. You both became frightened, and there is no need to blame yourselves.

I gave you portions of it in the past. At Ruburt’s last visit to your dentist, both of you decided that his position was embarrassing, that it put you both in a bad light, that his condition spoke of invisible defects. Ruburt was frightened of going, had a very difficult time with the stairs, but made them. You said something like “It looks like you’ve had it, hon.” He could have said, “Had it, shit,” but he did not. You were embarrassed in the street. He was in people’s way. You were impatient.

You are compassionate toward others, and judge yourselves harshly. Ruburt felt he could not go out again until he could do so without embarrassing himself or you, and until he walked normally. If he walked all-right-enough in the house, however, then the time would come for another dentist visit or whatever. And he would have to go—so he would not walk that well in the house either—hence the table.

The fact is, neither of you wanted to appear on the street. You did not particularly want to be seen with Ruburt in his condition. You felt too sorry for him, and yet angry and embarrassed, and all of that was caused by concentrating upon the problem, projecting it in the future, in the definite belief, for all I have said, that that method of problem-solving works.

You both thought Ruburt should hide in the house. You were too proud to show your defects, because in your eyes such defects are so horrendous, and Ruburt’s condition becomes the symbol for all of man’s physical distress, in your eyes.

(10:35.) Have Ruburt use last week as a basic model of operation, while adding to it. You can help when you are feeling confident enough, by reminding Ruburt when you see that he is bothered, that his body is healing itself. All of this, in which left alone it seems natural that the body will always take the worst rather than the better course, and that any problems are to be solved by stressing them.

You do not spend time worrying about what is going to happen to Ruburt’s condition—meaning, how much worse he might get, either of you. Ruburt appreciates the motion that he has, and starts from there, and that motion will be increased. He concentrates upon what he can do, and enjoys it—and that will bring about beneficial projections.