1 result for (book:tps4 AND heading:"delet session april 3 1978" AND stemmed:him)
[... 8 paragraphs ...]
First of all, it is important to realize that Ruburt’s unconscious, so called, is not working against him on purpose, sabotaging his projects. The subconscious does reason, but it also reasons according to the information that you give it.
[... 1 paragraph ...]
You have a good point of organization with your pendulum work today. Fear of the kind mentioned (scorn and ridicule)is behind the symptoms. Whenever our sessions, your own efforts, or other events, have convinced Ruburt either of the personal safe universe or of the basic safety of the self, that reassurance helped quiet the unconscious fears, and allowed him then to direct his will toward physical improvements.
[... 3 paragraphs ...]
Later, when he returned home, he learned that he must toe the mark again, or Welfare would put him in another home. He must not make waves. It was not safe to stand out. His food, clothing, and survival depended on toeing the mark. The church provided a family of sorts, but that family also was dependent upon religious obedience. Ruburt’s high spirits and abilities fought against such circumstances. He finally broke away from the church—running to college—a college considered by the church at the time as communistically inclined, antireligious, and so forth.
[... 2 paragraphs ...]
Your own joint sexual love was too hot for either of you to handle, and you both tempered it with intellectualism and caution; but for all of that it has endured. Ruburt’s abilities and energy kept seeking fulfillment. Through those years he considered himself an outcast from society, and he did not know where his abilities were leading. He tried to toe the mark while doing his own thing. He did not identify with the world or its people. He identified mentally, however, with science, with the avant-garde, and so was sustained. At the gallery, for example, when your psychic work began, he did not speak out, and you encouraged him not to, and you both considered this as a scientific kind of breakthrough. When Ruburt discovered that his energy and abilities had led him to a point where he was at odds with religion and science, and had no place to roost, thematically, he became very worried.
[... 1 paragraph ...]
A point also from the past—if he did not toe the mark with Walt, Walt also threatened to abandon him—once, in the middle of the desert.
He found himself with you and his work. He would do what he would do anyway, protecting himself as he thought fit. When the feedback stopped, the subconscious became panicky. Since so much of Ruburt’s life was involved with yours, it felt that Ruburt must now toe the mark with you also—at least topside —so that he must not express any contrary opinions, or that you would abandon him also, in which case he would be utterly alone.
[... 1 paragraph ...]
He fears the books will not sell, because he is afraid, as in childhood, that if you do not toe the line your sustenance will be taken away. Remind him that financially at least that not toeing the line has paid off very well indeed, and in your pendulum work inform the subconscious of that.
[... 4 paragraphs ...]
His new room gave him the view that he wanted, but no protection—and not only that, but then he was the one who met guests head-on.
All of this goes back, forgive me, to fears that the spontaneous self will in one way or another get him in trouble.
Give us a moment again.... Obviously the unconscious is spontaneous, but his early experience taught him, as given earlier this evening, to use that spontaneity with care. The subconscious feels that it is doing its job, because Ruburt has not allowed feedback; not approving of fear, not allowing the feelings release, and therefore also cutting down on experience that could counter the feelings and show the subconscious that the fears were exaggerated.
[... 1 paragraph ...]
Ruburt does not think that you are afraid, for you seldom voice any fears. He feels, therefore, that he is a coward, that fears make him seem abject, that they are unacceptable. On various occasions, when the suggestions in his papers worked—you follow me—they worked because at the same time Ruburt was writing down his feelings: his aggressions and his fears.
[... 8 paragraphs ...]
My standards of spiritual behavior, I would say, are as pertinent as your own, as “high,” yet I can honestly say that your self-righteousness blinds you both to the good intent, however misguided, in say even political actions. Look how Ruburt’s unconscious tries to protect him, with symptoms that you certainly find most disagreeable, because Ruburt has not given his unconscious, say, all of the facts.
[... 5 paragraphs ...]