“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

He found himself with you and his work. He would do what he would do anyway, protecting himself as he thought fit. When the feedback stopped, the subconscious became panicky. Since so much of Ruburt’s life was involved with yours, it felt that Ruburt must now toe the mark with you also—at least topside —so that he must not express any contrary opinions, or that you would abandon him also, in which case he would be utterly alone.

Give us a moment.... Ruburt did not approve of fear. He felt it was, again, cowardly. It was given no validity, nor acknowledged as valid. As the books continued to sell, several conflicts arose. They served expression and creativity, and they insured financial security—but at the same time they made Ruburt’s unofficial “dangerous” thoughts publicly available. They told the world he did not toe the line, and he feared retribution, ostracism, scorn.

As his abilities blossomed, the safeguards turned into fortifications. He could not counter the fears because he would not acknowledge them. The unconscious therefore felt forced to take stronger measures.

(10:20.) Give us a moment.... At times, again, inroads would be made. I have probably mentioned before that in college Ruburt would cross the street often rather than meet a group of students. The pattern simply intensified. The Gallery of Silence affair was simply another episode, in which fears were poohpoohed, but he was afraid that those people would come here, and he felt threatened.

He felt that aggressive action was also threatening, for the same reasons as just given. You do not bite the hand that feeds you. The feelings of panic are the result of fears usually buried, when they simply reach a point of intensity that seeks acknowledgement.