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TPS3 Tuesday, August 16, 1977 Notes 3/13 (23%) foot ankle decent knees walking
– The Personal Sessions: Book 3 of The Deleted Seth Material
– © 2016 Laurel Davies-Butts
– Tuesday, August 16, 1977 Notes

[... 1 paragraph ...]

PM—As these improvements occur—and more are happening; both knees feel more responsive and ... moveable; a few things came to me. Earlier caught myself stewing over my windows new room being accessible that is, noticeable; then cleared that up saying that Frank, etc., will be gone; phone book won’t have address; winter coming—but if I have to, I’ll lock the screen door or put up a note working hours no guests; but anyhow I’ll make conscious decisions and take steps. Then thought, nearly crying: I cut down desire—like loving to shop, and am afraid now to mix with people—then said Rob would help me there—in decent walking shape surely my attitude would be entirely different—so different it’s hard for me to imagine then to the importance that I make distinctions between the natural world; and the social or cultural one. I must be free to walk in the natural world, to see its wonders. Obviously now I don’t feel free to walk outside or down our road—surely those feelings will fade with decent walking? Do want this discussed. And in the past I guess I did think if it had to be done, I’d cut out the body’s mobility to a rather severe degree... For what, dear God? But until lately I didn’t really feel that was wrong; or feel that I was... not being responsive to my own life....

[... 2 paragraphs ...]

Some vital improvements today—this is the background. My eyes were bothering me some, but I typed some James this afternoon; then Frank came in at 3:30; and Margaret B. came in to visit; I was annoyed; tired of people about, etc., but tried to be pleasant; as we chatted I felt my right foot and ankle changing. Afterward, over the period of the late afternoon and night, it seems that vast changes have happened all over:

[... 5 paragraphs ...]

All of this changed my walking tonight; right foot trying to walk properly, but not synchronized... as I write, further new motion top of right foot. Through this, eyes blurry off and on though some easier than, say, yesterday.

[... 1 paragraph ...]

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